Inexpressible
by onelastchance
Summary: She's spent her whole life protecting others; when she was young, it was her family, and now it's her targets, assigned to her by S.H.I.E.L.D. But when she's assigned to bring Loki in after the Chitauri invasion, it goes drastically wrong. Her life as she knew it is over, and she becomes an irreplaceable agent of change. Now with a healthy dose of Avenger-y goodness!
1. Prologue

This pseudo-prologue is a sort of flash forward, before we get into the meat of the story. Certain scenes in the future will be the reason this is rated M, but warnings will appear at the beginnings of those chapters. Please please please review, I don't want to beat the OFCxLoki pair to death if nobody is going to read and enjoy. Spelling/grammatical/other errors are entirely my own fault, please let me know if I need to make corrections. Oh, and I brought Coulson back. Because I can't bear to think he really died. Thanks, and happy reading!

* * *

**Prologue**

The rattle of the door handle and the cold of the metal didn't do much to ease her nerves. Debriefing was, without a doubt, Agent Zara Shade's least favorite part of working for S.H.I.E.L.D. She removed the earbuds from her ears as she entered the room; she had been listening to "Knights of Cydonia" by Muse on her iPod to get herself as pumped up as she could (which wasn't really pumped up at all) before she had to word-vomit the last four months of her life to government tape recorders. As she pulled a chair out from the table, its legs grated mercilessly against the floor, and she grimaced. Sitting with her legs wipe apart in spectacular masculine fashion, she crossed her arms and slumped against the back of the chair as she looked across the table at Coulson.

"Agent Shade, thank you for meeting with me," said Agent Phil Coulson, as he punched the "record" buttons on an old-fashioned Cassette recorder about the size of a brick, and two smaller digital recorders. This debriefing was not one S.H.I.E.L.D. _ever _wanted to lose.

_C'mon, Phil. Drop the formalities, for Pete's sake. You know I would rather go through Basic Training again, 100 times, before sitting in this chair._ She very nearly rolled her eyes at him, and would have were it not for the two "hidden" cameras mounted in the corners of the room opposite her seat at the table. Their power cords were neatly taped to the all-glass walls of the room, having been quickly set up to record this interview. Zara knew the glass was soundproof to humans, but she felt even more on display than usual, skin prickling with the feeling, because of who was on the outside of the glass.

Coulson spoke slightly louder than normal and very clearly to the room and the recording devices, "Agent Phil Coulson, S.H.I.E.L.D., October thirteenth, nine thirty a.m., debriefing…" and then to Zara, "Agent, please state your name and position."

Had you bet her a million dollars, or even ten million dollars, four months ago, that she would be sitting here, across from her colleague and friend, being interviewed about _this_, she would have sunk her right elbow into your jaw. "Agent Zara Shade, S.H.I.E.L.D., Level Seven and Lead P.R.O.T.E.C.T.O.R." She leaned forward slightly as she told the room who she was, her hand going to her copper-blonde hair, the tell Coulson read, correctly, that she felt acutely uncomfortable with what was coming next.

"… on her return from the alien planet… realm… of Asgard." She had never heard him so excited as when he completed that sentence. "Excited" for Phil would have looked somewhat like "fairly amused" did on her, but then she had never been one to hide her feelings very well. On her test to become a Field Agent, she had scored in the 100th percentile on protective instincts (literally; she made the highest score S.H.I.E.L.D. had ever recorded, before or since), in the upper eightieth on combat tactics and strategy, and in the low fifties on espionage; she wasn't good at being anybody but herself. Coulson's eyes glimmered just a little, and the left corner of his mouth turned up as he implored, "Please recount your mission, from the beginning."

"As the Chitauri attack on New York City was coming to a close, S.H.I.E.L.D. Directory Fury assigned me, in capacity of P.R.O.T.E.C.T.O.R., to bring in the alien god, Loki. He has since been confirmed as the… reason… behind the attack. We were winning against the Chitauri, and Fury deemed it time to capture him as a war criminal." Some of the color seeped from her already fair face, then, as she thought back on that day. Metal, glass, shreds of paper, shreds of _people_, littered the streets and sidewalks like so many leaves littered the yard of her childhood home at the end of Autumn. Civilian vehicles, taxis, and alien aircraft, all horrifyingly mangled, clogged the streets so much it could have been rush hour, except no sounds of honking or screeching tires echoed off the glass and concrete of the buildings, just deep rumblings and booms from adjacent streets and blocks.

She continued, "I was deployed to the second highest level of Stark Tower, the platform he lands on when he's in the Iron Man suit, where the target was supposed to be. Once I located him, I realized he was… out of commission. Conscious, able to move, but clearly worn out from the battle." A look through the glass into a pair of aquamarine eyes sent a shiver through her insides, and she looked away and brought a hand to her eyes, sighing. It had been a long four months since that day. "Banner did a good job beating the shit… I mean, beating him up, but I managed to get the target to the top of the tower, where Agent Romanoff was executing emergency medical aid on Dr. Selvig. The tesseract, and its cradle, were still holding open the hole in the sky, but the nuclear missile was already on course for the city. Stark, Iron Man, had been in pursuit for about a minute, then, I think. Apparently, the enemy could sense the tide turning… a huge brute of a Chitauri broke off from the main column as he came through the portal, and made a bee line for Stark Tower."

All the years of training, the hours spent on the reconnaissance missions, literally staring death in the face and learning how to block it out, save herself and her targets, tore from her mind then. This "guy" had been almost twice the size of a regular Chitauri, and his helmet crested over the crown of his skull instead of fitting snugly like the others'. Even without the bright coloring of what looked like blood drawn in grizzly patterns all over his armor and flyer, she could tell he was a Commanding Officer, in U.S. Military terms.

"He drew his weapon and fired, but not at the target or me, at first. The weapon was different from the other Chitauri guns… the blue glow of the gun was a lighter shade, and sharper… hard to look at directly. And the metal was brighter. It almost looked like the ugly, smaller cousin of the scepter that Romanoff used to shut down the space portal, actually." She blinked purposefully, twice, and took a breath, not noticing how Phil's blood pressure had spiked or how his posture straightened at her mention of the scepter-like weapon. "He shot at the tesseract, which, of course, didn't accomplish anything. The only option I had was to get the target out of the way, but the instant I made contact with the target to drag him out of the way, the Chitauri turned on us, let out a bark of _laughter_, and fired." Phantom pain flared in her left hip on the word "fired".

After a pause, Coulson gently prompted her. "Do you remember anything else, Agent? It's understandable if you don't, but any information could be a game changer later, as I'm sure you know."

She knew he threw in the sympathy because they had a bit of a history together, dozens of missions working with one another; any other operative would have gotten an unemotional, upfront command to continue. She smiled warmly at the thought.

"The blast, it hit both of us. Myself and Loki. In my left side, and I believe the right side of his chest. Either way… I couldn't see, but I could hear, the Chitauri leave the rooftop on his aircraft; I would guess he wanted to detach the tesseract from the machine, and when that didn't work, figured revenge against Loki was a better consolation than nothing. Agent Romanoff must have left Dr. Selvig, and came to check if we were still alive. Right before I blacked out, I registered that Stark had made contact with the nuke and was headed for the hole in the sky, and that Romanoff was scared shitless… sorry, she was _taken aback_, because… my wounds weren't bleeding. She'd have to tell you what it looked like, but it felt like my whole left side from my knee to my elbow had been run through with lightning bolts… then I passed out."

"And the target, Loki?" asked Coulson. "Where was he during all of that?" Phil's eyes had softened when hearing Zara recount the attack, but had grown wide at the promise of information on the infamous would-be ruler of Earth, the jackass who had stabbed him in the back and nearly killed him.

She chuckled too softly for even for the recording devices to hear, and answered, "Shot up just as badly as I was, right next to me. The heel of his boot came down square on my shin," _making for a total of 47 bones broken in a single second_, she finished the thought to herself.

Over three more hours, Agent Zara Shade told what she could, everything she remembered; she answered Coulson's questions and never grew tired of his promptings or requests for more detail. This debriefing hadn't been half so bad as she thought it would, if you didn't count that first part. Phil had even paused the interview to let a S.H.I.E.L.D. intern in with lunch (toasted ,smoked turkey wraps, one of her favorites). He had known she wasn't crazy about debriefing in the first place, and this would be one of the longest and the most detailed he had ever had to get. He decided that ten minutes of rustling sandwich paper in the background of the recording was a fair price for her willing cooperation, and for that small, delicious decision, she was thankful.

"One last question, Agent Shade," said Coulson, the trash from their lunch cold and stale near the edge of the table. She nodded.

"I understand that Odin, the political leader, King of Asgard, requested that you accompany his sons, Prince Thor and the war criminal Prince Loki, to their home…realm. I also understand that the tesseract provided the energy needed to transport the three of you across the galaxy. But didn't you say that Odin removed the tesseract from Thor's possession immediately, and he placed it in what you describe as a… 'weapons vault slash treasure chest'…", he grinned when he said "slash" aloud, "for safekeeping? Never to be used again?".

"Yes," she responded simply, knowing what was coming next and already smiling widely at the thought of explaining it.

Coulson regarded her with a level look before asking his "one last" question. "How did you get back home?"

At this, she again met the pair of aquamarine eyes that belonged to one of the main characters of her story, of her life, now. Loki had been pacing outside the glass room almost the entire time, sitting on a bench against an outside wall only to eat his lunch. For those nearly four hours, he had silently been reacting to her retelling. His guilty, furtive glances at the spoken parts; the dark looks as his face flushed at the untold moments, had thrilled Zara to no end. To get any reaction out of him over so short a time was an accomplishment she did not begrudge herself, and to see color like _that_ rise in his cheeks… There were two sides of the story here: the official one, full of military jargon, that she spewed, honestly and nearly completely, to Coulson for S.H.I.E.L.D.'s records, and the infinitely more intimate one that only she and Loki had lived. Loki met her clear, gray eyes, and smiled with her, as she answered.

* * *

What did you think? Yes? No? Maybe? Stay tuned, we'll learn more about our heroine (and her job title!) and everyone's favorite God of Mischief in the next chapter (hopefully- please let me know if you like it!)


	2. Normal

Thanks to those who are reading, and extra thanks to the reviewers! Hope you all enjoy this chapter.

Forgot to mention in the last chapter, but it's really quite obvious: I only own the OCs. Damnit, Marvel.

* * *

**Normal**

"…all of her vitals l-l-look fine, Director. Her blood pressure is back up, heart beat steady. Um, uh, we changed the dressings on her side just to be safe after we gave her the dose of super serum. A-a very small dose, of course, just to speed up her skin and organ regrowth and repairs. Ah, Director, she's waking up…".

Zara cracked open her right eye slowly, and saw that S.H.I.E.L.D. Director Fury was standing in front of slight, dark haired female doctor. The woman's eyes were jumping nervously from Fury to the paperwork in her arms, and she looked slightly affronted. Fury had that affect on people.

"Agent Shade, nice to see you alive," said Fury, in that humorless way he had about him.

"You too, Nick… heard the Helicarrier got pretty trashed," she responded through a haze of morphine and exhaustion, trying fruitlessly to sit up. She found she could do no more than lift her neck, and she looked questioningly at the physician.

"Agent, I'm Doctor Allen. I'm sorry we couldn't meet on a happier day; I'll be in charge of your case until you leave. You won't be able to sit up for probably two weeks, maybe one if you take to the super serum very well." She seemed to gain some confidence when she didn't have to speak to Fury.

"Your side was, to put it mildly, blown to bits… broken ribs, nearly ever bone in your arm… what worries us is your pelvis. It's tricky to set properly under normal circumstances…"

"But this is far from normal?" asked Zara.

"I'm afraid so; you're in a full-body brace until then. It's possible there will be, ah, more complications, but we won't know for sure until everything is healed up. Do you have any questions?"

She choked out a laugh. "When can I go back to sleep?"

"That's up to Director Fury, Agent. I'll step out into the hall until you're d-done here, Director." And with that, Dr. Allen stepped through the automatic doors of the infirmary. Zara now saw that she was in one of about ten or twelve beds, all along one wall, in a long hospital ward. Her own bed was positioned right in front of the door, probably so the doctors could keep an eye on her. No other beds were occupied at the moment, but the sheets on the bed furthest from her were messy.

Fury's face immediately became grave. "I'm so sorry I sent you into that firestorm, Za-"

But she talked over him, or rather, rasped, "Shut up, Nick. I don't need to hear this. I'm alive." She took a moment to clear her throat. "You couldn't have known, it should have been routine… don't worry about it. Just make sure I come out of this place with a whole body… speaking of, where is this? If you say 'Stark Tower'…"

"Very funny. No, we're in one of the S.H.I.E.L.D. bases outside of Washington, D.C. When the field medics brought you in… you weren't _bleeding_. You should have bled out on the rooftop in seconds. Do you have any idea what happened?"

Zara took a deep breath, and set immediately into a fit of coughing. It took several minutes, but she managed to control herself before answering, "The Chitauri shot me… us. I was trying to drag the target away when he fired at us. You think the weapon cauterized my skin? Were Agent Romanoff and Dr. Selvig-" Her brain was scrambling to recall what had happened as Fury interrupted her.

"Romanoff and Selvig were uninjured. At least by the enemy who got you. From what the doc says, she doesn't think it cauterized anything. She said, how did she say it? 'It's like someone did a cross-section of her insides.' You're not sealed up, you just aren't… leaking out... either."

"The super serum?"

"Yes, that's why we're in D.C. The closest cache of serum was at the Pentagon. One of Banner's stateside interns has been working with it. He was trying to make improvements on it, but we've… acquired… his whole batch. Since you weren't actively dying, we made the choice to try to fix you back up."

"Mmm, thanks so much… think it'll work?"

"You're still alive. Doc said you would probably start to feel itchy where the serum is working. Look, I've got to go back to New York to do damage control, but I just wanted to see you, to apologize, before I left. I owe you and your dad, I didn't want you to-"

"Stop, Nick. Get out of here. I'm sleepy, and now you've made my whole side itch." With that, she promptly closed her eyes tightly.

"Get well soon," Fury chuckled softly, squeezing her good hand gently, and exited the ward through the automatic doors.

* * *

She came to sometime later, but it could have been a couple of hours or several days for all she knew. It was nighttime, she could see, because the window at the end of the ward was dark, except for the ambient light from the streetlamps outside. She craned her head around to try to find a clock, but to no avail.

"Fuck…" she said under her breath. She didn't know what day it was, or even what time it was. _I guess I'll just stare at the ceiling. Sounds fun. I better get at least a month of vacation after this…_

"Such unnecessary use of profanity, human. You wish to know the time, I presume?" A smooth, cool voice interrupted her thoughts, somewhere off to her left.

Immediately she became acutely frustrated, and though she would never admit it, scared, that she couldn't move. Her eyes found the source of the voice as she consciously began to slow her heart rate. The soft "beep" of the machines measuring her vitals did nothing to help her, and she hated how obvious it was that _he,_ Loki, had startled her.

"Yes, thanks," she answered. _Holy shit, he's taller than I realized. More beautiful, too... stop that! _Now was definitely not the time to be making observations like that.

His shockingly blue eyes narrowed at the sentiment, but answered her all the same. "It's eighteen minutes to four in the morning. And a little over an hour since the last human healer came to monitor you," he added, a tinge of something like danger creeping into his voice.

Zara regarded him with a level look, barely winning the battle with the hammering of her heart. She waited a moment before asking her next question.

"How long have we been in here?"

"_We?!_" he nearly spat at her. _"_There is no '_we_'. _You_ are the puny mortal, hooked up to machines, needing the help of _super serums_ to stay alive! "

"Calm down, man," she rebutted, practically scoffing at him.

"Do not think to instruct _me_. Are you not frightened? I, a god, who nearly captured your _planet_, could kill you in seconds and you could do nothing to defend yourself!"

She breathed in through her nose, eyes flashing, before answering.

"That's far from the truth, and you would do well note it. There's a reason you're here, and I doubt it's because you enjoy the decorations. You're stuck here, are being kept here as a prisoner. Director Fury would never allow any wounded S.H.I.E.L.D. agent to stay in the same room as alien war criminal in possession of all his capacities, so you've either lost your _super powers_, or they've been neutralized. We were both hit with that Chitauri weapon, and though you seem to be physically fine, it's unlikely that you've been anywhere but in this wing of the building since being brought in."

Loki gaped at her, utterly taken aback at her brazen response. It unnerved him that anyone, especially _a woman_, in such a compromised position would have the gall to address him in such a way. It unnerved him far more that she was right.

She took the moment before he could compose a response. "I'll ask again, how long have _we_ been here?"

She waited for a response, but it seemed she wouldn't get one. She added, "Even if you wanted to kill me, and if you wanted to you've wasted ample opportunity, I would claw out your throat before you laid a finger to mine."

And with that, she closed her eyes, hoping he wouldn't see through her bluff. It was possible that she could get a hard fist to his temple if indeed he lacked his "powers", which she was guessing at blindly, but she would do her best to take him with her if he tried anything.

The soft padding of footsteps retreating to the bed furthest from hers accompanied his words. "Six days, five hours, and forty four minutes."

Her left eye slid open, but she didn't turn her head. "Thank you." _Kill him with kindness._

* * *

Zara was overwhelmed by the feeling of itching that lit up her side; she had never felt anything like it, and she thought it was almost as bad as being shot. She felt inflamed, and her side continued to burn. She tried to shift her body, to get some kind of friction going between her skin (_Was there skin there, yet?_) and the brace that held her body in place. It didn't work.

Dr. Allen entered through the doors across the room from her bed. "Itching?" she asked.

"Like a bitch."

Empathy softened the doctor's eyes, and she nodded. "I know it's unbearable, but it's a good thing. The serum is working, and your body is healing. Mind if I have a look?"

"Course not." Her voice was almost back to normal, and her head was clearer than it had been in days. Loki had either been out of the room the few times she had returned to consciousness, or he stayed at what she had come to refer to as "his" end of the ward, out of her vision, until she fell asleep again.

The doctor walked around to the left side of the bed and lifted the sheet, exposing Zara's hot skin to the air. It was then that she realized her hospital gown was thinner than the thinnest linen, and she jerked her eyes to the end of the ward where Loki was staying.

The doctor noticed, and tried to put her at ease. "He's been roaming around the wing for about half an hour this morning. He's completely terrorized my newest resident, but Fury has ordered us to let him get out of the ward. Said he'd go stir-crazy if he had to stay in one place."

"Crazier than he already is, at least…"

Dr. Allen laughed. "Yes, indeed. Well, your skin is growing back nicely. It'll be extremely sensitive for a month or so. Does this hurt?" And she began poking strategically up and down Zara's side.

"Ah, not exactly. It feels… sore, but not truly painful."

"Good, that's to be expected. I'm going to keep your hand in its cast for a couple more days, to give the serum some extra time to finish up with your bones, but I think we can take full brace off tomorrow afternoon. You'll have to be careful sitting up, and I only want you walking to go from the bed to the bathroom and back… we'll stock you up on some anti-itch ointment, too. Expect to be in here another week to week and a half," she finished up with a warm smile, and replaced Zara's sheets.

Before she could leave, Zara asked, "Doc? Can you tell me about Loki? Why is he in _here_? He doesn't seem to need to be in a hospital."

Dr. Allen dragged a chair over from the bed to the left and sat. "Director Fury would be better able to tell you, but I'll do my best. I overheard him while he was here checking on you last week, and from what I can tell, Loki has lost his power. I'm sure you read his files?"

Zara nodded. Of course she had, several times, most recently on the jet into New York in preparation to retrieve him. Loki was a genius, according to his brother. An accomplished sorcerer, too. He had never been all muscles and fists like Thor. She'd read Thor's files, too, but they seemed less pertinent, since he was clearly an ally.

"He's lost his magic, and apparently whatever abilities absolve the Asgardians from eating and sleeping. He was in bad shape, like you, immediately after the Chitauri invasion… but by the time he got here, his body was physically back together. I would have thought he would struggle or try to break out, but when he regained consciousness he just laid in the bed. Didn't move, didn't speak. Just stared at the ceiling. He had it out with Fury, which is probably what woke you up while the Director was here, but he hasn't put up any kind of fight at all."

This news threw Zara for a loop. "Why is Fury keeping him here?"

"You haven't seen, since you've been in and out for so long, but some of the boys from the Experimental Sciences wing have been taking readings on him every day; different kinds of radiation, x-ray, gamma, infrared. Banner's intern wants to get as much data as he can, to see if there is any quantifiable difference in the readings from non-magic Loki to magic Loki, assuming he'll ever get his magic back when we can test it. Fury okayed the little science experiment, but didn't want Loki anywhere near the technology they're working on up there."

"That sounds ridiculous."

"You're telling me," Dr. Allen said, standing and replacing the chair. "Let me know if he's bothering you too much, and I'll see what I can negotiate with Director Fury to get him moved somewhere else."

"Thanks, doc," Zara replied, settling back into her mind as Dr. Allen took down a few more notes before heading out the door.

These circumstances were _definitely_ not normal. At least her suspicions that Loki was significantly weakened were confirmed, and she knew Fury would never leave her in a room with Loki if he thought she couldn't protect herself. Thor had been pretty forthcoming to Jane Foster during his previous time on Earth, and she had in turn been forthcoming to S.H.I.E.L.D., especially when Fury threatened to keep her equipment and documents. Thor had been sent to Earth without his power as a punishment from Odin, his father and King of Asgard. _What did he call him? The Allfather?_ From what Zara could conclude, Loki had his magic, or healing abilities at least, until he got to D.C, but sometime while he was unconscious Odin had taken them. Whatever Thor had done, she was sure Loki's recent indiscretions surely outweighed it. Maybe he never would get his power back, at least during Zara's lifetime. But why was he still on Earth? Wouldn't Odin want him back on Asgard? _I wonder if he'd freak out again if I asked him!_ The least she could do while holed up in this bed was try to get some good recon on Loki and his state of mind.

The next week was shaping up to be decidedly interesting.


	3. Black, Blue, and Red

Thanks to everyone reviewing, following, and favoriting! This fic is my first true effort in writing, and I really appreciate getting everyone's feedback. This chapter is a little longer than the previous ones (and we finally get some Loki!). I'm thinking the next chapter could be a glimpse into Loki's brain- thoughts?

Once again, I don't own anyone but the OCs. Happy reading!

* * *

**Black, Blue, and Red**

Dr. Allen quietly shut the door to her office, turning her head from side to side. She sighed at the popping of the vertebrae in her neck; she could go for a shoulder massage, that was for sure. She crossed the office to sit in the black leather chair at her desk, dialed the number for Agent Maria Hill's mobile phone, and waited.

"Agent Hill," clipped the young agent's voice. Dr. Allen had treated her for minor burns during her early S.H.I.E.L.D. training several years ago, and her overall impression was that the girl followed orders well, was generally personable, and was pragmatic and efficient to a fault. Hill had risen through the ranks very quickly.

"Hello Agent, this is Dr. Samantha Allen. I've been treating one of Director Fury's P.R.O.T.E.C.T.O.R.s, and need to discuss her case with him. He neglected to leave a contact number, as I'm sure doesn't surprise you."

"Not in the slightest. Hold a moment?"

"Of course." The doctor exhaled loudly and brought her hand to her face, massaging the bridge of her nose. She collected her thoughts as much as possible. What she was going to tell Fury didn't make much sense to her, so there was little chance it would make any sense to him. She was on hold for several minutes until she heard the soft electronic feedback of Hill's phone coming back on line.

"Yes, Doctor? Make it fast, if you please."

"Director Fury, I've j-j-just removed the full-body brace from Agent Shade. She's healing at an inc-c-redibly accelerated rate."

"Isn't that what the super serum was for? If this is your update, doctor, I-"

"Excuse me for i-i-i-interrupting, Director, but she's days ahead of where she should be in her recovery, even with the serum. Sh-she's all but burned through the first dose, from what I can tell from her p-progress and her blood work. I had expected she'd need at least one more dose of equal v-v-volume to get to this stage, but I don't think it's necessary anymore." _Why can't I get a grip? I knew I never should have taken this job, Fury scares the shit out of me… _

Allen collected herself and finished her summary, "Zara came in here with gaping holes in her side that weren't bleeding out, and now she's healed twice as quickly as expected. Something else is going on here, Director."

Fury was quite for a moment. "All her tests look normal, correct? Nothing out of the ordinary?"

"Except for the s-super serum, she's one hundred percent human, sir."

His next question confused her. "Is Loki behaving himself?"

"F-for the most part, yes…?"

"Continue with Agent Shade's treatment, Dr. Allen. She's a bright girl… I have a feeling she may be able to figure this one out on her own. Thank you for the update." And with that, Dr. Allen's phone clicked dead, and she silently rejoiced. S.H.I.E.L.D.'s employee benefits were the best in the world, but they were looking less appealing every time she had to speak to Director Fury.

* * *

It was hard for Zara to describe how absolutely _heavenly_ it felt when Dr. Allen and her team removed the full-body brace. Her body still hurt like hell, but Zara could twist, turn, rest on her side, sit up… laying in bed for a week would sound like a welcome comfort to most people, but not when you couldn't move more than an inch. She knew it was necessary, but she felt like an invalid the whole time.

She sighed so loudly the Motion Picture Association would have had an easy time giving it an "R" rating, but couldn't find it in herself to feel badly for it. Dr. Allen laughed lightly, and the youngest looking member of her team flushed bright red. _I'd bet fifty bucks she's the one Loki has been terrorizing._

"Alright, Zara, your system has used up the super serum patching up your skin and bones. You'll be recovering at a more human pace now. There will be a _lot_ of bruising and your muscles will become fatigued much faster than usual, since you've been laid up for so long. I'd like you to try to stand up while I'm here, so we can gauge where you're at physically."

"Sure thing, doc." Zara swung her legs over the edge of the bed slowly. If this _had_ been a movie, she was sure "Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor would be playing in the background. She braced the hand that wasn't in the cast on bed's side rail, and slid forward gingerly.

Her feet made contact with the icy linoleum, and she bit her lip at the sensation. After being wrapped in (unnecessarily) warm sheets for a week, the cold was a welcome change. Dr. Allen moved just the slightest bit closer as Zara shifted her weight from the bed to her right foot, and then shared it with her left.

In the second that her backside left the bed, several things happened at once. Her knees came out from under her and she almost dislocated her arm trying to hold onto the bed; Dr. Allen and the youngest doctor lunged forward to grab her before she hit the floor, and the automatic doors in front of her bed slid open to reveal the figure of Loki. His usual sneer morphed into a look of disgust at the sight of her, _what did he say? A "puny human,"_, who needed the assistance of others just to stand upright.

His eyes met Zara's first, moved to Dr. Allen's, and then to the young girl's. He jutted his chin quickly, and the girl made an apologetic noise, dropped her hold on Zara, and sprinted from the room. _Did Loki just _feint _a__t her?_ Lucky for Zara, the doctor was bearing most of her weight, so she didn't fall all the way to the floor.

One of the male team members stepped forward and gripped Zara under her arm, and together the trio righted her. She perched herself lightly on the edge of the bed, trying to coax her quads, hamstrings, and calves to work together, and looked darkly at Loki, "Talk about unnecessary. What was _that _for?"

He regarded her coolly before answering. "My own entertainment, of course. I am the God of Mischief, you know. This… place… has become dreadfully dull."

Dr. Allen looked like she wanted to say something, but a look from Zara convinced her otherwise. Breathing in deep and controlling her exhale, Zara eased back up onto her feet, this time with the male doctor on her left and Allen on her right. She looked at the man's badge, which read "H. Williams."

Loki was almost to "his" end of the ward when she asked, "D'you like to read, Loki?" She realized it was the first time she had ever called him by his name to his face, and something purred ever so softly in her chest as she said it.

Perhaps he felt it, too, because he turned back to their little party at the bed a little too sharply. His facial features were high and angular, and the way he worked his jaw, just slightly, like he was trying not to answer with all his might, made the cousin of that _something _in her chest flutter somewhere lower in her torso.

Trying to cover her own reaction, she said, "Your files say you're a practically a genius. I bet you've been bored out of your mind wandering around here this last week." He continued to regard their little group, Dr. Allen to one side, Zara towering over her, and H. Williams, just a few inches taller than Zara, on the other. Loki seemed to settle back into himself.

"I do like to read, very much," he finally responded, and it was like the words were from someone completely separate from the vicious, wild Asgardian she had encountered to that point.

Zara took her hand off the railing of the hospital bed and took a tiny step forward, Dr. Allen and H. Williams shadowing her on either side. This time, she did not falter. _How symbolic_, she thought sarcastically. She allowed herself a small smile, and looked from Loki to the doctor. "Good! I do to. Do you think you could manage to get us some books up here, doc? I'll need something to do now that I'm going to be awake during the day. Just whatever you can get your hands on, an assortment, although I would be forever grateful to get my hands on some Tolkien."

Dr. Allen was facing directly at Zara, trying to anticipate any more falls or stumbles, and Zara was glad Loki couldn't see her face. The doctor's face wore the most incredulous expression she had ever seen, but the shorter woman regained her composure mercifully quickly.

"I think we can work something out, Agent. Now, let's see if you can make it over to the bathroom by yourself…"

* * *

It seemed that day kept getting better and better. Zara was out of the brace, had succeeded in making a (however miniscule) connection with Loki, and just an hour later, Agent Natasha Romanoff veritably sauntered into the hospital ward.

"Nat! Holy shit, how good to see you!", exclaimed Zara. She immediately began the complicated process of sitting up, only to realize, "Jeez, I probably stink. Don't come too close!"

Natasha batted down Zara's hands and leaned in for a very gentle hug. "You smell okay, it's your hair that's horrifying," she laughed and lifted up a duffel bag that Zara recognized as her own. "I stopped by what was left of your apartment in New York and got some sweats and shirts, and some _shampoo_. I figured you'd want a decent shower and something to wear besides these hospital gowns. I know I did."

"And _that_ is why I love you."

The red head set the bag down on the bed next to Zara's, and hopped up to sit on the bed with her friend, patting her on the leg. "How are you?"

She let out a low whistle. "Well, I'm alive, which is great. They gave me a small dose of super serum because I was torn up so badly, but doc says it's done its work. Now I've got to stay here for a week or so, until I don't need to be monitored anymore. My bones creak and my muscles ache, but I'm here. What about you?"

Natasha smiled grimly. "Not in nearly as bad a shape as you. I'm glad you're ok. You looked… destroyed, up on the roof of Stark Tower. It's been a long time since I've seen anything quite so grizzly, Zara. I could _see_ your insides… like you got shot but then your body stopped… stopped reacting. What do you think happened?"

"To tell you the truth, I've been unconscious almost the whole time since the attack. They started letting me off the morphine yesterday, and I'm been awake all day today, but I haven't had much opportunity to consider it…"

"That's completely understandable," Natasha responded sympathetically. She seemed to sit up straighter as the subject of Zara's mysterious condition passed. _Did Fury put her up to this? _"Now, would you like some help taking a shower? The longer I sit here, the worse you do start to smell!", she teased.

"I owe you a box of cupcakes for this; that sounds amazing. We'll need to cover my cast…"

Natasha dutifully retrieved a plastic bag from somewhere outside the hospital ward and wrapped it around Zara's cast. There were two bathrooms in the hospital ward, one between Zara's bed and Loki's, and the other on the opposite end of the ward from both. They chose the latter.

Zara alternately refused Natasha's help and welcomed it on her trek down the ward. In a space she normally could cross in less than ten seconds, it took her almost five minutes to shuffle the whole way there. Natasha asked Zara as they were walking, "Fury told me to expect to see Loki while I'm here, but I haven't seen him yet. Has he been moved?"

"As far as I know, he's still staying here," she replied through gritted teeth. She was thankful for Agent Romanoff's help. "Or rather, he's still being kept here. He roams around this wing of the base whenever he wants, from what I can tell. I've been pretty stale company up until now."

Natasha made a sound in agreement, and they reached the bathroom. It would have been awkward for the both of them to be present in such a usually private setting, but they had been through a lot together, seen everything from mangled alien bodies to wormholes opened in the sky above New York City. The human body seemed mundane in comparison.

Zara removed her hospital gown awkwardly, using her good hand, and Natasha flinched.

"Jesus, Zara… have you seen yourself? Whoa…"

Zara turned her body slowly until she could see herself in the mirror. Until then, despite the _ridiculousness_ of the situation, the Chitauri, the trauma to her body, her mysterious not-dying, she had held herself together well, been very professional about all the crazy things that had happened to her. Seeing her body like this, left side all mottled black, blue, and red, her skin raised in a bastard starburst pattern radiating out from the flare of her hip, was enough to build a painful lump in her throat. She struggled with herself for a moment as hot tears gathered in her eyes, but managed to keep them at bay.

"I'm good, I'm good," she chanted as she moved away from the mirror and dropped her hospital gown on the floor, drawing back the curtain of the handicapped shower. With one final "I'm good", she turned the shower handle and waited for the spray of water to heat up. Thankfully, Natasha chose to not comment further on her condition, but handed her soap and shampoo around the edge of the curtain.

When she was done with her shower, which took much longer than normal, either because she had a week's worth of sweat built up on her skin or because she could only use one arm (or both), Natasha helped her dry off and dress in a simple sports bra, white cotton shirt, and gray sweatpants of the softest material. Zara looked at herself in the mirror; she looked and felt like a totally new woman.

Natasha was supporting the majority of Zara's weight as they exited the bathroom, she was so worn out from the ordeal. They were almost back to Zara's bed when Loki walked through the automatic doors in front of them, his silhouette all straight nose and perfect posture.

Zara felt Natasha's body go stiff, and quickly said, "Well, Nat, thanks for all your help. I can make it back to the bed on my own, I think." After a quick (gentle) squeeze, the Black Widow walked away from her friend and out the door past Loki, only meeting his eyes with a defiant look for an instant.

Zara decided not to acknowledge the tension in the room, in favor of staying on her feet and inching forward toward her bed, using the wall for support along the way.

It was finally Loki's turn to begin the conversation. "I wasn't aware you knew the Black Widow."

Zara looked at him quizzically. "Why would you?" And then it came to her. "Oh, Clint." _Who you brain washed, mind-fuck, into utter subservience._

"Yes. Agent Barton, what is his little S.H.I.E.L.D. nickname? Ah, the 'Hawk'."

"Hawkeye," she corrected, about half the distance left to her bed. Loki showed no apparent signs that he didn't appreciate being corrected.

"Hawkeye. He provided me with much information indeed about the members of the 'Avengers Initiative' before…"

"Before they beat you?"

Loki glowered and continued, "But he mentioned no particular bond between Agent Romanoff and anyone but himself. And he made no mention of _you_."

_Almost there! Just one bed away_. "Well, I was never part of the Avengers Initiative. And he wouldn't know she and I were friends… I don't think we've all three been in the same room together, now that I think of it. You asked me how I know her? I brought her in to S.H.I.E.L.D. the same was I was supposed to retrieve you. Her case went smoothly, but yours…"

"Landed us here?"

She miraculously made it to the end of her bed, which she braced herself on heavily. "Yes."

Loki leaned against a bed only two away from her own, and Zara automatically let her senses take over, becoming attuned to and observing everything she could. He had never appeared this relaxed before, but the change did nothing to relax _her_.

He crossed his arms as he said something that shocked her. "Well, I'm sorry to have been so much trouble for you, but I still don't know who you are."

"Thanks for the apology, I think." She took the time she needed to clamor into her bed to scramble her brain for her answer; she eventually settled on the truth. _I think there's still morphine swimming around in my head…_ "I'm sure you know my name by now?"

"Zara Shade. An unusual name, even for a Midgardian." She was immediately grateful she was already on the bed, because the way he said her name was nothing short of sinful; it made her knees weak. _You're a grown-ass woman, Zara. Stop that._

"Yes, well. I'm a P.R.O.T.E.C.T.O.R., and that's part of the reason Clint, Hawkeye, wouldn't have told you about me."

"I've found that S.H.I.E.L.D. is overly fond of acronyms."

She laughed. _Did he just make a joke? Did I just _laugh_ at his joke?_ "Tell me about it. It stands for Prisoner Retrieval Operative on the Team for Espionage and Coercion Tactics, under the Office of the Republic."

At that, Loki arched one eyebrow and regarded her skeptically.

"I know, I know. I always say that whoever came up with the title just tried to pick words whose first letters spell 'protector'. But I basically retrieve political prisoners or war criminals from high risk situations and deliver them to S.H.I.E.L.D. Usually they know information that would benefit S.H.I.E.L.D., or they could be used as bargaining chips with hostile agencies. They must be kept alive at all costs, that's where the 'protector' part comes in. In the case of the Black Widow, Director Fury sent me in to retrieve her after Clint broke protocol and didn't kill her. He didn't trust Clint to capture her himself."

"And you were assigned to me to accomplish which of those ends?"

"I don't usually find out, and if I do, it's always after the target's purpose for SHIELD has been fulfilled. So, I'm sorry to say I don't know. Even if I did, I wouldn't tell you."

Loki smirked at that, and was quiet for several minutes as his attention turned inward. Zara was almost sure he was done with their conversation when he asked, "You said the captives you retrieve for S.H.I.E.L.D. must be kept alive at all costs?"

"Yes?"

"Is that why you didn't leave me, hide yourself, on the roof of that building? Why you tried to save me from the Chitauri?"

She sensed it was a more personal question he was asking than his words let on, but couldn't find it in herself to falsify her answer. "Yes. Your life is worth more to S.H.I.E.L.D. than mine."

The way she said it, so matter-of-factly, put him feel ill at ease. Who would accept a position which threatened your life with every mission? She seemed like a vibrant young woman, obviously had friends, but… maybe this human was more like him than he was ever prepared to admit. "Well, I owe you thanks. Whatever your reason, you saved my life. With a direct hit, the weapon that Chitauri chief was wielding would have killed me. It seems my allies have become disenchanted with me."

Zara's face softened, and for the first time, she felt like this week would not only be interesting, but might even be pleasant. "You're welcome, Loki." _And again with that feeling in my chest_. She saw his eyes widen slightly, but before the situation got any weirder, she asked a question she'd been pondering since the beginning of Natasha's visit.

"Since we're getting all personal and touchy-feely, I have a feeling you can answer this. When the Chitauri weapon hit us, why didn't I die?"

* * *

Eeeek! Thoughts? Let me know, and I'll be taking votes for Loki's POV for the next chapter! Thank you for reading!


	4. Mischief

Loki, Loki, Loki. This chapter is all about him, and I hope you like it. He's hard to write, so feedback on how I did (is he in character? horribly not?) is welcome. My apologies for not getting back to those who reviewed "Black, Blue, and Red", but I was busy working on this chapter. My life's about to get realllllly busy, so I want to get as much done as possible before then. Hopefully more frequent updates?

Thank you so much to everyone who is reading, reviewing, following, and favoriting! The traffic graphs are really humbling :)

Don't own, or I wouldn't be writing on here. Happy reading!

* * *

**Mischief**

Loki kept his eyes closed and allowed his other senses to reach out. He was on his back on a hard, smooth surface… no, that was _wrong_. He should have been splayed out on a gravel roof, partially entwined with whichever nameless agent of Earth's S.H.I.E.L.D. that buffoon Fury had assigned to capture him. Fury reminded him too much of his… of Odin. He decided it was the eye patch.

It was quieter, here. He supposed it was possible the Chitauri had been defeated, but no sirens or other alarms played in his ear. The air around him was inconsistent with the rooftop on Midgard, too. There was no blazing sun making the leather of his clothing too hot or baking his skin. It was dimmer here, wherever here was, the light diffused and more golden than white… _No…_

"Stand, my son," the voice of the Allfather echoed through the throne room.

Loki opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling for a moment. Hardly anyone ever bothered looking _up_ in this room, but it was his favorite part of the entire palace. Like the rest of Asgard, it was built from shining, golden metal, but the similarities ended there. Instead of the strong, stable structure that was the trademark of the city, the ceiling above him seemed to be soaring, floating. Intricate patterns were carved into and through each of three thin layers of metal that swam dynamically, unsupported by nothing other than magic. Each tier moved independently of the others, filtering the light into different patterns. By the time the rays made it to the ground floor, they were so diluted it seemed as though the room was filled with consistent, warm light.

He stood, slowly at first, but more quickly once he realized his body was uninjured, despite the Chitauri's efforts. Face carefully neutral, only Loki's blue-green eyes betrayed his anger.

"I am no son of yours. You made that clear on the Bifrost."

Odin's low voice rumbled through his chest. "Loki, you twist my words once more! You possess the sharpest mind Asgard has seen in millennia, and yet you refuse-"

"I refuse to accept the limited possibilities of the universe to which you subscribe, Odin! You are blind to our potential, our _right_, as superior beings to rule-"

Odin rapped his staff forcefully on the on the floor causing Loki to fall silent, a fierce look on the Allfather's face accompanying the magic woven into the sound of metal meeting stone.

"I cannot think where your mother and I failed you, but we never taught you that enslaving others, below or above your station, for _any_ reason, was righteous. It would seem your edification is not complete… I once told you, you were born to rule. I have been proved wrong once again. You will never rule through violence and hate."

Hurt flashed across Loki's face and was replaced with nothing short of malice, but it did not escape Odin's gaze. _There is hope for him yet._

Odin took a breath before making his ruling. "As atonement for your crimes against the throne of Asgard and the people of Midgard, I take from you your power, Loki Odinson. You have been found unworthy of their gifts, unworthy of the designation of Asgardian, unworthy of your title of Prince of Asgard." The Allfather paused, breathing ragged, so obviously pained to be reprimanding his son. _However difficult, it is just._ "I banish you from this realm. You will be confined to Midgard to live among those you would conquer. You will learn what life is like outside the Aesir, what it is to be… human."

The look in his eye as Odin finished his sentencing scared Loki most of all. He looked like he was saying a goodbye to a dead man.

"Goodbye, Loki. My son. I cast you _out_." And Loki's astral form vanished from the room, replaced by the swirling light coming through the ceiling, as if he was never there.

Frigga emerged from one of the archways behind the throne. "He will see, my love. He will learn."

Odin thought of his wife's penchant for knowing the future, and it would have been reassuring if she would share her vision with him. She never did.

"And if he does not?"

* * *

Loki awoke in yet another unknown space, but he knew immediately he was back on Midgard. The mortals made such a racket doing the simplest things. He opened his eyes and sat up.

He was sitting on a narrow bed at the end of a long, white room. The caustic smell of the place assaulted his nose as he noted wires, tubes, and curtains hanging next to the dozen beds leading away from his own. One bed about halfway down the room was occupied. He focused more intently on its occupant and realized it was the S.H.I.E.L.D. minion who had been attacked with him on the roof of the Iron Man's tower. She seemed to be heavily sedated, far from consciousness.

Memories of his banishment from Asgard just moments ago surfaced in his mind. His eyes trained on the edge of a sheet at the end of the bed next to his, and he snapped his wrist. Nothing happened, not even a spark. _Odin has kept his word. I am mortal._

* * *

This place would be the death of him. From overhearing the conversations of the doctors, _and from my shouting match with Director Fury_, he gathered that he was in what the Midgardians called a hospital, although the error in simply calling it a healing room was beyond him. He was forbidden to leave this part of the building. The unconscious girl's name was Zara, and her condition was truly abnormal. Apparently her body had stopped… dying, after obtaining her injuries from the Chitauri. They had injected her with a small vial of an opalescent liquid they called "super serum" to help her heal.

_Curious._

He had nothing to do but stare at the ceiling, so unlike the one in the throne room of Asgard. He had counted the tiles, imagined all the possible patterns they made, and when he was bored with that (about an hour later), he moved to the walls and floors. At the one hundred and sixty seventh floor tile, a skittish looking young woman came to check the machines that monitored Zara's heart rate, blood pressure, and a host of other functions. _Time for some fun_.

After the third time two wiry, awkward young men wearing glasses came to take "readings" on him, trying to quantify radiation levels from the magic that they didn't know he didn't have, he approached the automatic doors in front of Zara's bed. Fury had forbid him from leaving the medical wing, but Loki hoped to find something, _anything_, to do outside this room. The woman in the bed had been unconscious for days, but from time to time he would her make small noises, soft notes, like she was singing in her sleep. There was never much room for music, the kind the Midgardians were used to, on Asgard, for all the blond hair and muscles and swords. Poetry of great deeds done by greater gods? Yes. A stirring form of expression? No. As he passed by her bed, he noticed the dark circles under her eyes were receding, and the slightest pink was coming back into her face.

Over the next several days he memorized every nook and cranny of the hospital wing, and did his best to satisfy his need for mischief with the young, easily-frightened doctor. He began to sense from Dr. Allen's body language and a small _tutting_ sound she made when she looked at the documents at the foot of Zara's bed that she was unsatisfied- no, perplexed by the copper haired woman's recovery. From what he could see, Zara looked healthier everyday; she must have been feeling better, too, to have given him such verbal whiplash.

_Very curious._

The day before they removed the brace from the woman's body, Loki found himself lost deep in thought; about Odin, about his punishment. Thor had been banished to Midgard, but the Allfather had left him a way out, a way to gain back his power. _That look he gave me, he did not hold the same look for Thor on the Bifrost. He looked fed up, done with me. Not simply betrayed._ Odin did not expect to see Loki ever again.

Something not unlike remorse welled up inside him, and the latex glove he had been examining in his hands started to smolder and writhe, the plastic in contact with his skin heating up just enough to melt. Interest sufficiently piqued, Loki immediately set about determining the extent of the magic he still possessed. To his dismay, he could not create another event, no matter how hard he tried. _I could have done better than that in my sleep as an infant. _Odin could take the advanced abilities he had spent millenia developing and refining, it seemed, but could not remove his essence, so integral a part of Loki was his magic.

_Pity._

He was still pondering his discovery when Dr. Allen bustled out from the hospital ward with a concerned look on her face. She stepped through the door marked "Dr. Samantha Allen, M.D." and shut the door behind her quietly. Already in an investigative mood, Loki followed her and leaned his ear towards the door.

He heard her speaking but didn't recall anyone else being inside the office; when he could hear no one respond but she continued with the conversation, he surmised she was speaking on a, _what did they call it? _A telephone. She asked for Director Fury, and Loki waited several moments before hearing anything else. He heard her murmuring but couldn't understand what she said. Apparently neither did Fury because she began speaking once again.

"… days ahead of where she should be in her recovery… need at least one more dose of equal v-v-volume … don't think it's necessary anymore."

He heard her next sentence loud and clear.

"Zara came in here with gaping holes in her side that weren't bleeding out, and now she's healed twice as quickly as expected. Something else is going on here, Director."

He stepped away from the door, his earlier suspicions about the girl's condition growing.

* * *

The next day he left the ward early in the morning, hoping to escape the hullabaloo that was sure to accompany the removal of Zara's brace. A group of five doctors, led by Dr. Allen, gathered around the bed. Loki had finally wandered back to the doors but stayed outside the room; this was the most entertainment he had seen all week. He let his mind wander to his encounter with the girl days before.

"_Even if you wanted to kill me, and if you wanted to you've wasted ample opportunity, I would claw out your throat before you laid a finger to mine."_

She had been polite enough until he had threatened her, but she proved to be as volatile as he was. He would have had no quandaries killing her on the spot a week earlier, but so much had changed since then. There was truth in what she said, he knew. Director Fury would never leave one of his protégés in a situation beyond their control, another parallel he had with Odin. His mind drifted to the day on Jotunheim when Thor had…_no. That life is over. _She had an altogether nasty mouth, a trait which Loki considered correctable, and therefore a fault.

So it was surprising to him that when she all but _moaned_ as the brace ceased contact with her skin, when she bit her full, pink bottom lip as her feet touched the floor, he felt something flare in his gut. It had been a long time indeed since he had felt anything akin to that. He must have shifted his pose, set off the motion sensors on the automatic doors, because they opened, leaving him with little option but to walk through them.

Zara fell in that instant, whether of her own accord or because the sudden movement startled her, he couldn't know. His eyes alighted on her legs, long and shapely even after all she had been through; the sight added fuel to the flame in his stomach. He didn't know what to make of this, this _human_ who couldn't even stand on her own, and the influence she had over him. He let his frustration out on the youngest doctor and scared her out of the ward.

It was both the wrong and the right thing to do. _"D'you like to read, Loki?" _He dearly loved to read; indeed it was the only thing besides sorcery that he would say he "loved". His time in the hospital ward would have been very different up until now if he'd had access to books; that didn't change the fact that he wanted nothing to do, wanted to have nothing in common with, this woman. But when she said his name, he felt a _hum_ in his chest, which he recognized as his magic immediately. She felt it, too, he saw on her face. And something else, before he answered her.

His suspicions expanded into a full blown theory. When the Chitauri weapon hit them, it blasted his magic apart, fulfilling its design. Part of the magic, an infinitesimally small part from what he could tell, had latched itself onto Zara. She had been so close, touching him, trying to drag him away. He was fortunate for that, because the full force of the weapon was shared between the two. His life was spared, but now it was wound into this woman's, this Zara Shade's. He hoped this connection between them was the reason he had to force himself to look her in the eyes, stop his own from roaming, as she emerged from the shower draped over the Black Widow. If it wasn't, his transition to mortality was going to be very mischievous indeed.

* * *

What do you think?! I appreciate any and all reviews! And I don't want to ruin anything, but this isn't going to be a "Loki-slowly-makes-progress-and-gets-his-power-back-in-increments-along-the-way" fic. He truly has been reduced to himself.


	5. I Don't Believe You

Hello all! Here's the next chapter, complete with ever-thickening plot.

To Celia, you anonymous devil you- I felt like most of the Loki-slowly-gains-his-power-back stories were just too unrealistic. Loki totally trashed Jotunheim, teamed up with THE Big Bad Wolf, and tore up NYC. I just don't think Odin would be so lenient, I suppose.

THANK YOU to all who are reviewing, following, favoriting, and reading (i.e. YOU should leave me a review so I can thank you personally!) :)

Don't own, woefully don't profit.

* * *

**I Don't Believe You**

"I'm a HORCRUX?!"

Loki had just finished explaining that a small part of his magic rested in Zara, and this was the last reaction he had anticipated.

"… a what?"

"You have _got_ to be kidding." Zara brought her hand to her face, mouth falling open at the revelation.

"I'm sorry, but I don't see how this makes you a 'whore' in any way…"

Zara sighed. "Not a 'whore', a Horcrux." She thought for a moment. "Tell you what, ask Dr. Allen or one of the other doctors if they're willing to let me use their laptop or iPad for a second, would you?"

Loki moved towards the door, silently mouthing "iPad", and Zara continued. "But leave that younger doctor alone. I don't think she can handle any more bullying today." He smirked, but didn't refuse her.

In the few minutes before Loki returned, Zara's mind cranked into high gear trying to think of the possible scenarios this new discovery could lead to. Would she be able to use the magic? Would it fade away over time? Was it a finite amount, or would it only be capable of simple spells? Could her mortal body support it, or would it eat away at her from the inside out?

She thought of her hyper-fast recovery, and it occurred to her that Loki's magic was what saved her on the roof of Stark Tower, and aided the super serum in rebuilding her body. It seemed they were tied 1-1 in life saving.

The doors slid open and Loki stepped through, holding an iPad out from his body with both hands like it was a soiled diaper. Zara held her good hand out to receive it and asked "Who's is this?"

"The male doctor, Willams'."

"Good. That poor girl…" she laughed, and tapped on the icon that would take her to the internet. She was pleased to find that S.H.I.E.L.D. wasn't stingy with its Wi-Fi. She went to Wikipedia immediately, and typed "horcrux" in the search box.

Loki had remained standing near the foot of her bed as Zara punched different spots on the slim tablet she called an "iPad".

"Come over here. I don't bite unless bitten first. Read this," she said, patting the space on the bed in front of her. Watching Loki sit there was a bit like watching Dr. Sheldon Cooper from "The Big Bang Theory" try to intentionally touch another person: hilariously awkward. She contained her amusement to a wide smile and handed Loki the iPad as he settled. She waited patiently as he began to read. "_A __**Horcrux**__ is an object used to store part of a person's soul, protecting them from death. If the body of a Horcrux's creator is destroyed, the person is still able to survive, much the same way as…_"

After a minute or so, she had to show him how to scroll down the page to continue reading. She saw he was reading the section about each individual Horcrux, and she let herself really consider what was going on here. She could (barely) wrap her mind around the all the Science Fiction… Asgard, super serum, magic, the Chitauri, the tesseract, Loki's God of Mischief and Lies status. What she couldn't understand what why he was even talking to her, would even consider sitting there with her. He had been trying to help an alien species destroy New York, was planning on ruling the human race, only a week and a half before. She had seen the tapes from Germany, how he had threatened the crowd into kneeling before him, the look of cold superiority on his face.

The Loki here was different. Zara sat near the head of her bed with her legs carefully folded in front of her, facing him. He sat with his legs over the side of the bed, looking intently at the words on the iPad. She could only see his profile, but she could tell his whole body relaxed when he was reading. His features softened, _as much as they could, anyway_, and his shoulders lowered just the slightest bit. At least he wasn't sneering at her anymore.

"This idea of a Horcrux is fascinating, but I contend that my soul is still intact. The only thing stored inside you is magic," he stated when he was finished reading. He handed the iPad back to her, and their fingers grazed each other.

The purring in her chest when she said Loki's name was nothing compared to this feeling. Electricity flooded through her body from the point of contact with Loki's skin. Every nerve sang, and she thought she could hear a low hum, like interference between a microphone and an amplifier. And then the feeling rushed back, retreating from the tips of her toes and out toward her hand. The whole time she was aware that the feeling was separate from herself, like a layer of _something else_ covered her and was reacting to the touch.

The iPad dropped to the bed as her eyes darted up to meet Loki's and she yanked her hand away.

"_What was that?"_ she asked darkly.

Loki regarded his hand before answering. "I believe that was the magic, my magic, responding to me."

Her only response was two raised eyebrows and a skeptical look.

"Truly. It has been part of me for centuries... What is your weapon of choice on your assignments for S.H.I.E.L.D.?"

"A Walther PPK. Semi-automatic pistol."

"And how would you feel if you could no longer use it? If the weapon you knew best, that felt like merely an extension of yourself, was taken away?" Zara's face fell, and Loki continued. "I wondered if this would happen. It recognizes me, can tell when I'm nearby. That's what you felt. I don't know if its reaction will get worse or better over time."

Zara chewed her bottom lip. "Can we try again?"

Loki gave her a curious look as he offered her his hand. _His eyes are the most amazing pale green…_ Zara reached out cautiously, but this time the magic's reaction was less dynamic. It buzzed around her with a familiarity and she felt like it was _home_ when she was touching Loki's hand. She was dimly aware that his skin was cool.

"Better?" he asked.

She let go, and the magic felt… disappointed. "Definitely better."

Loki looked to his end of the hospital ward and was quiet for a moment. "I'll return the… iPad… to the doctor. Would you mind if I asked Dr. Allen for the Harry Potter books? I think I would find them interesting."

"Of course! They're amazing. I think you'll like them, too," Zara responded with a smile.

And with that, he lifted the iPad, less gingerly this time, and walked through the automatic doors.

* * *

Zara's appreciation for Natasha's thoughtfulness increased as she was going through her bag. It was either very late night or very early morning, depending on how you looked at it. She was a little embarrassed, but she had fallen asleep before Loki had returned to the hospital ward. She hadn't been able to sleep very well, though, and blamed it on the events of the day. Loki was asleep, or appeared to be, so she began going through the overnight bag as quietly as she could.

Her shower products were still in the bathroom, but she found her toothbrush and toothpaste, a tube of mascara, and a small mirror. _Wishful thinking, Nat._ She also rifled through two more t-shirts, another pair of sweatpants, and several pairs of underwear which were far more practical than the mascara. She was almost to the bottom of the bag when her hand hit cool metal.

"My iPod! Bless you, Black Widow!" she exclaimed under her breath. She had even packed the power cord. Since she didn't have anything else to do and the books she had asked for earlier weren't there yet, she popped in her earbuds and pressed "shuffle". She laughed out loud when Santana's version of "Black Magic Woman" began playing in her ears.

She felt rather than saw or heard Loki stir, and she pulled one of her earbuds out of her ear and paused the music. "I'm sorry. Did I wake you?"

"Only a little," he said, sitting up. Until now, she had only seen him wearing the leather and metal outfit he had worn the day of the Chitauri attack, despite the rips and tears all over it. Now he was wearing what must have been the tunic and loose leggings that went under it. He was slighter than she had first thought, but broad shoulders pulled at the shirt and well-muscled legs filled out the leggings. He said something to her, but she fumbled a response.

"Um, what?", she asked, mind snapping back into focus.

"You were making noise and tossing and turning while you were sleeping."

"Sorry. I think I'm having a hard time relaxing because I'm only taking ibuprofen for the pain now… I'll ask Dr. Allen if she can give me anything stronger at night."

Before she lost her courage, she blurted out a question she'd had all day. "Can I use it? The magic?"

Loki answered slowly, "It's… possible, I suppose."

Adventure shown in her eyes and she beamed. "Teach me something! I mean, could you teach me something, please?"

He gave her the look a babysitter gives a petulant five-year-old, which she took as a "no."

"I'm sorry, is it like a violation for someone to use someone else's magic? I didn't mean to offend you."

"That isn't the case. I simply don't want to be kept awake while you try to set fire to everything in the ward."

"Teach me how to freeze something, then."

Loki's face nearly crumpled in on itself.

"Jeez, I'll shut up. Ice giant, of course, so insensitive… I'm really sorry. I'll be quiet. Go back to sleep." Utterly embarrassed with herself, Zara shoved the earbud back into her ear and flopped (or rather, gingerly reclined because of numerous injuries) back onto her bed.

"Zara!" Loki called loudly from the end of the ward. Her name sounded so _delicious_ when he said it…

She turned toward him with an apologetic look and removed her earbud.

"In the morning, I'll have a go at helping you. At least someone ought to be able to use that magic."

She smiled widely in return and cranked up the volume on her iPod.

* * *

Zara had fallen asleep again sometime after their exchange, filled with excitement. How often did you get to use the magic of an extra-terrestrial super villain prince? _Never. Until now._ She still had a lot of questions, but she had another week to ask them. Priorities.

Her subconscious mind was still gloating over the turn of events when her dreams turned… strange. It was one of those dreams that was so jumbled and shadowy that it's impossible to put your finger on _why_, but it makes you anxious. Flashes of a blurry scene, purple and green surrounded by blackness, the deep feeling of dread, obscure scraping noises, the screeching of metal… it was like watching the preview of a horror movie only every second played simultaneously. She almost felt nauseous.

Her conscious mind jerked her unceremoniously into the waking world. Instantly she sensed cool skin against her forearm; her eyes shot open at the same time she lashed onto a pale, slender wrist. _Loki._

"Why are you touching me?", she asked, her voice low and serious.

"I am not touching you. _You_ are touching _me_," he smirked, withdrawing his hand from Zara's grasp.

Pulse pounding in her ears, confused by the lingering uneasiness from the dream, she met Loki's eyes. A deeper green than before. "What are you doing?"

He watched her carefully sit up. "Having a bad dream?"

"What?"

"You were practically thrashing around in your bed, so badly I thought you might reinjure or otherwise harm yourself. I was preparing to shake you awake, but…". Loki's eyes narrowed and his brow furrowed, like he was thinking furiously about something.

"But what?"

"The magic…" he said softly, reaching out before Zara could react, and grabbed her hand.

Zara could feel herself relax at the touch even while her brain was screaming that something about this was wrong. It took her a few seconds to realize the feeling was seeping into her from the magic that felt like a second skin now. She forced herself to speak, and her question came out a little louder than the situation called for. "What about the magic, Loki?"

"Were you truly having a nightmare?" he asked, his tone and face serious.

"Yeah, actually. Do you think I could have my hand back?"

"Apologies," he murmured, letting go. "What did you see, can you remember anything from the dream?"

"Uh, everything was sort of… far away, like I was watching and listening through water. I didn't see anything clearly at all, but I was, scared, I guess. Like something horrible was about to happen. I don't know, really…"

"This certainly complicates things. The moment I touched your hand, you quit flailing about…"

"That's probably because you woke me up out of a dead sle-"

"No, you stayed asleep for several moments. I felt the recognition of the magic briefly, and _then_ you woke up."

"…so?"

Loki let out a sigh. "The magic is unsettled. It doesn't know you, isn't used to you, and now it knows I am near."

"So, your magic is making _me_ unsettled, and I writhe around in my sleep unless we're… in physical contact with each other?"

"It seems so, yes."

Zara took a few seconds. Her life was getting out of hand. "Why didn't this happen before, while I was on the super serum?"

"I believe it was because you were so heavily sedated. Morefling, did you call it?"

"Morphine."

"Yes, morphine. And the magic didn't know I was here until earlier tonight, when I handed you the.. iPad."

_Boy does he catch on fast._ "You're saying I won't be able to get a good night's sleep unless we're touching? Because now the magic _thinks_ and knows you're close by and can't bear to be away from you?"

The look of relief on Loki's face as she understood was like the silence after a wave crashes onto the shore. "Yes."

Zara exclaimed rather suddenly, "I don't believe you. Go back to bed." With that, she laid down and pulled the sheet over her head, leaving Loki exasperated, standing in the middle of the hospital ward, glaring at her bed. _At least he didn't shout at me for telling him what to do._

* * *

Let me know what you think! Have a great weekend :)


	6. Share Time

A _huge_ THANK YOU! to everyone who has reviewed, followed, and favorited since the last update! Your input has been so supportive (constructive feedback is welcome, as well), and I'm glad you're enjoying. Don't forget to review at the end of the chapter to let me know how I did!

Still don't own or profit... bummer.

On with the show! Happy reading!

* * *

**Share Time**

Zara slept fitfully for another hour or so, then gave up. She got out of the bed quietly, as it appeared Loki was still sleeping. She grabbed her toothbrush and toothpaste, contemplating the mascara. She rolled her eyes and made her way to the bathroom, leaving it in the bottom of her overnight back.

As she was brushing her teeth, she pondered this latest in a long string of revelations. The truth was she did believe him, his explanation about her ineptitude for restful sleep stemming from the magic inside her needing contact with Loki. She could feel it. But was having this new power worth being stuck with him? And would it go on _forever_? She still needed to find out if the magic was expendable, or even if she would be able to get rid of it.

And then there was that fluttering feeling below her navel that she got when she hoped he wasn't looking. No warm-blooded (or cold-blooded, she thought) woman, and probably many men, could deny Loki was a beautiful piece of work. She lacked any empirical evidence, but she was sure he was _cut_, and something in the way he looked at her convinced her she would _not_ be disappointed, if their shaky relationship ever got to that level. But that was madness! Hopping into bed with an Asgardian super villain was a worse life decision than accepting the mission to retrieve him in the first place. So many things could go wrong, she would be open to so many more risks than she was currently, and that was saying something. She had to sort this out as quickly as possible.

Realizing she had been staring at her reflection, toothpaste dribbling out of the corner of her mouth, for the better part of five minutes, she finished brushing her teeth and rinsed her mouth out. She felt better, having fresh breath for the first time in over a week, and realized she was hungry, hungrier than she had ever been in her life.

Nearly ravenous, she exited the bathroom and tossed her toothbrush and toothpaste in her bag, making her way to the automatic doors. She tried to hurry, but her injuries kept her at a snail's pace. _Maybe another dose of super serum wouldn't be so bad._

The first person she saw outside the ward was the male doctor, H. Williams, looking over a stack of papers at a computer desk to her right.

"Agent Shade," he greeted her.

"Hey, doc. I'm sorry I haven't gotten your name before."

"Hank Williams, pleased to meet you," and extended his hand.

"Any relation to the Country music singer?" she asked, taking his hand with her good one and making a supreme effort to shake it with any semblance of strength.

"Sadly no, but I get asked that all the time. How are you feeling, Agent?"

"Just call me Zara. And I feel fine, except I'm pretty sure I'm literally so hungry I could eat a horse."

He laughed, "Sure, sure. I was just about to go on break and head to the cafeteria, the coffee down there is about sixty times better than the stuff in the vending machines up here. Think you're up for a little field trip?"

"I'd go on a field trip to the dentist's office happily if there was a sandwich and some macaroni and cheese involved."

* * *

Zara and Hank Williams (now nicknamed "Bocephus" after the singer, and shortened to "Bo") were still laughing about an episode of "The Big Bang Theory" that had been on one of the TVs in the employees' cafeteria as the doors to the hospital ward slid open. Bo bid her farewell and she responded with a hearty, "See you for breakfast tomorrow, Bo?"

"Of course. I'll see you then," he responded, flashing her a genuine smile.

Zara turned around to walk further into the ward but paused at the look on Loki's face. It was somewhere between disgust and contempt, with just a smattering of surprise. She spoke as neutral a "Good morning," as she could, hoping he would recover from whatever he was feeling and let her have some peace. A box of books had been delivered while she was gone, and she thought she saw the spine of _The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King_ peeking out from under an old, leather bound book.

"Morning," he responded coolly. _So far so good_. She walked over to pick up the Tolkien volume, sensing this wasn't over yet. "You weren't here when the young doctor brought those in."

_It's like pulling teeth with him._ "Yeah. Did you scare the bejesus out of her again?" She wasn't going to make this easy for him, that was for sure.

"I managed to restrain myself." His face was clear of emotion now, but his eyes were veritably boring into her, unblinking.

"Good job! I'm proud of you," she responded. Just a hint of emotion crossed his face, but he kept his eyes on her while she bent to retrieve her book. The old volume on top of her goal was titled _Omnibus of Norse Mythology_. This little message from Dr. Allen was not lost on Zara, and she picked up both books.

She turned and walked the books back over to her bed, set them down, and turned back again to face Loki, who was still looking at her like he could _will_ her to tell him where she'd been. She returned his gaze for almost a full minute before sighing heavily and saying "Ask me where I was, Loki."

His eyes narrowed, and it looked difficult for him to formulate the words, but he did. "Where did you go this morning with the doctor, Williams?"

"I went to the cafeteria with him to eat breakfast. I woke up before you did and was all kinds of hungry."

"Why did you call him 'Bo'?"

"Oh, that's a long story, but it's a… nickname I made up for him, I guess," she shrugged.

"Your relationship is a close one then? To be doling out nicknames?"

Zara smirked, sensing where this was going. "Not really, I just ate a meal with him."

"You intend to do so again, tomorrow."

"Yes, I do. He's good company, and is pretty funny sometimes."

This exchange was driving her crazy. It always did when people tried to hide their feelings… Loki wasn't going to show his cards, she could tell, but he still looked as if he was trying to come up with something to say to her. Thoughtful turned into awkward silence, and she decided she couldn't take it anymore.

"Are you jealous that I went to breakfast him, Loki?"

The god's mouth fell slack with shock, but he quickly closed it. "Of course not."

She tilted her head and crossed her arms, clearly unconvinced.

"Why would I be? He broke bread with you once. I have essentially slept with you every night for over a week."

At this, Zara doubled over and laughed, truly laughed from the bottom of her gut. She saw Loki smile as she gasped for breath, clutching at her left side. It hurt to laugh like this, but she couldn't help it. She grabbed the end of her bed and continued to struggle to breathe between guffaws, but eventually she did regain control of herself.

She stood up straight, wiping tears from her eyes, as residual giggles interrupted her next question. "Would you like to go to breakfast tomorrow, too?"

He regarded her for a moment, and was satisfied with what he saw, whatever it was. "Yes, I would. But I doubt Dr. Allen would let me leave this floor."

"I'll see what I can do… So. How about we work on some magic, eh?" She was so excited, Loki found it impossible to refuse her.

* * *

Several hours later, Zara had succeeded in nothing but exhausting herself. And possibly spraining her right wrist. Loki had showed her the appropriate movement used to incite combustion, but everything in the hospital ward remained woefully free of fire.

"This sucks, Loki. Are you sure I can actually use the magic?"

"Yes, I'm sure," he responded with not a small amount of condescension. "You have to focus completely on the object and exert your will through the energy inside you. Try again."

She was sitting on her bed, Loki beside her, both facing the one next to hers. A balled-up paper towel rested in the middle of it. She crooked her right hand the way he had showed her and was halfway done closing her eyes when he corrected the form of her hand.

"Like this, thumb pointing straight down." The feel of his skin was electric on hers, and her eyes fluttered shut. She kept them closed in a vain attempt to pass it off as her continuing with the spell. It took her several seconds to push that feeling from her mind and picture the paper towel. Putting everything she had into the intent of lighting the it, she flicked her wrist purposefully.

She opened her eyes and saw that the topmost corner was smoking. At last, it worked!

"Oh my god, Loki! I did it!" Zara exclaimed, launching herself from the bed to look at her work. "This is awesome! I still have a long way to go, but-" she stopped as she turned and looked at Loki.

His eyes showed a mix of pride and relief that she had finally gotten it right, but his mouth showed such sadness, presumably because he couldn't use his own magic (or at least, for a very long time).

Zara didn't really know what to say, but she felt she had to say something. "Hey, I'm sorry if this is too much. You don't have to teach me any more if you don't want to… we don't even have to talk about it."

He met her eyes, and suddenly she realized he was having a harder time than he was letting on. "You think I didn't deserve it?" he asked.

Just like before, when he asked her why she kept him alive, she couldn't bring herself to lie. "I don't know what your punishment was specifically, but I'm sure you deserved it." Loki looked confused as she continued, "But that doesn't mean it has to be rubbed in your face all the time."

He laughed bitterly. "A fair assessment. No, it pleases me, what you just accomplished. This is my last, how do you Midgardians say it… 'fuck you' to Odin, teaching you how to use this magic."

Zara snorted, "I thought you disapproved of such foul language."

"There are limited instances where I find inserting a curse the only way to convey one's point. That was one of them."

She just shook her head, letting them sink into a not uncomfortable silence. She looked at the floor as he retreated into himself a little, but mustered her courage to break the silence. "Is this magic finite? Will I eventually use it up?"

"In a way. If you performed a complex spell, complex for you at least, that needed every last bit of energy to cast, you would be rid of it. However, it possesses certain qualities of regeneration. Say you cast a spell which required half the magic; over time, the remainder of the magic would slowly produce more energy, eventually replacing its lost counterpart."

"Kind of like the battery in a car?"

She was met with a blank look.

"Sorry. Ok. Well that's good, I guess. And I can physically support the magic, right? It's not going to sizzle its way out of my skin or anything?"

"You humans are no different physiologically from Asgardians, when they are in their humanoid forms."

"So, I'm good?"

"Yes, you're 'good'."

Zara was just about to cross back over to her bed to begin practicing again when Dr. Allen entered the ward. The doctor was surprised to find like this, Loki sitting cross legged in Zara's bed and Zara standing next to him, but she had the decency to hid her feelings quickly. "If I could have a moment with Agent Shade?" she looked to Loki, who nodded and _dismounted_ the bed almost unfairly gracefully. He looked through the book box briefly, found _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_, and retreated to his end of the ward.

"Agent," called Dr. Allen. Zara's eyes snapped back to the older woman's face. She had been completely unaware she had been following Loki with her gaze.

"What's up, doc?", eyes telling her _"Don't ask."_

"I'm here to check up on your cast, see if we can take it off today or if we should leave it on until tomorrow. How's your arm feeling?"

"Just fine. I haven't had any pain in it at all since coming of the morphine, so that's good."

The doctor began poking and prodding, and Zara remembered she needed to ask for stronger painkillers for sleeping… and then wondered if they would help, given the reason behind her restless sleep. She figured she would give it a shot. "Speaking of morphine, I'm having some trouble sleeping now that you're not keeping me under. Is there something stronger than ibuprofen you can give me before bed?"

The doctor frowned. This was the first hiccup in Zara's progress, but patients with trouble sleeping after trauma like this wasn't unheard of. "Well, I can't put you back on the morphine, or any other prescription painkillers, with a good conscious. Given your history, your risk of addiction is too high."

If Zara and Dr. Allen had been alone, the comment wouldn't have made the atmosphere in the room rocket from ordinary to acutely uncomfortable, but they weren't alone. Zara hated the way Loki noticed and looked up from his book, casting his questioning gaze on her. She flushed bright red and forced herself to look back at Dr. Allen, voice uneven.

"Any other suggestions, doc?"

Allen was as apologetic as she could be without giving too much away. "The best I can do is give you nighttime Advil or Tylenol, and we'll see how that goes. Are you having any other problems with anything? Walking, turning, soreness?"

"Nope, nothing out of the ordinary. Swollen and bruised, but on the mend. Are we done, doc?" Zara just wanted to curl up in a ball and never have to face Loki again. She couldn't believe Dr. Allen had brought up her past like that, in front of him…

"I think so, Agent. I'll schedule the x-ray to be sure your arm is healing for 10:30 in the morning. I'll see you then." Dr. Allen had never been so grateful to walk out of a hospital ward before, so awkward was the air in the room.

Zara grabbed the _Omnibus of Norse Mythology_ and climbed into her bed. She couldn't help but glance at Loki, who again wore a look of mixed confusion and interest. It asked _"Now what was that all about?"_

She allowed her face to smooth over, a hard look coming into her eyes. "Share time's over." She lay down on her bed and flipped to the table of contents, scanning for anything referencing the god still looking at her from above his book.

* * *

Dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuuun. Is share time really over? What's going on between Zara and Bo? Tune in next time to find out! DROP A REVIEW and you'll get a hint at what's coming up!


	7. Zeppelin IV

Hello everyone! I apologize for the wait for this chapter; this time of year is so busy! Here is more plotty goodness, and please forgive me of any grammatical/etc. errors, I wanted to get this out as fast as possible!

Consider this a formal invitation to **review**, follow, and favorite (but mostly review)! I'm assuming everybody is liking everything, but it sure is nice to know for sure! Thanks to everyone who has already done so.

Don't own. Happy reading!

* * *

**Zeppelin IV**

Loki left her alone for the better part of the afternoon, but about an hour after sunset, he put his book down (_Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban_; he read very quickly) and paced up the ward to Zara's bed. She was in the middle of reading about his episode of birthing a horse and ignored him for as long as she could.

"So," he broke the silence.

She slowly lowered her book and returned his gaze. "So what?"

"The doctor would not give you morphine to sleep. Care to elaborate?"

"No, I don't," she responded, and started to bring her book back up to eye level. Its progress was halted by long, pale fingers. Zara looked back up at Loki and sighed, "What do you want, Loki?"

"A question so few have cared to ask. I want a great many things, Zara, but right now I want to know about _you_. I haven't quite been able to… figure you out, let's say. And since you have been given the gift of my magic, I think I deserve some explanation."

She put her book down and considered his request. "Why? Why would you want to know anything about me?"

"We have cohabitated for a time already, and I expect we will continue to do so for a while longer. Now that you are conscious most of the time, we should at least be friendly towards each other."

Zara laughed. "You might be the god of mischief and lies, but I'm pretty good at telling when someone is lying, too. You don't strike me at all as the kind of guy who wants to get to know anyone just for the sake of socializing." She paused for a moment and thought. "It bothers you that Clint didn't give you any intel on me, doesn't it?"

His face morphed from placid to a countenance akin cold aggression. "It infuriates me, yes." Capturing the S.H.I.E.L.D. agent had been one of the better parts of his plan; Hawkeye provided him with the professional, and many times the personal, histories of the members of the Avengers Initiative, including the periphery members, Nick Fury, Phil Coulson, and Maria Hill. At the time, he considered it everything he need to know. He had not planned on being captured himself, subject to an unknown woman's poorly veiled attempts at establishing a civil relationship with him. The only card he had left to play was her obvious attraction to him; the misplaced magic would only aid him here, although he was reluctant to admit it.

"I might owe you something if you transferred your magic to me on purpose, but somehow I don't think you did", she said sarcastically. "You only want information about me now to manipulate me with it later, I get it. It's not going to happen." She snapped the book closed and started to get out of the bed.

"Where are you going?"

"To ask Fury if you can go to breakfast tomorrow."

Loki looked utterly dumbfounded. He didn't understand her; she wouldn't indulge him with anything about herself, and yet she was making an effort to help him, in however small a way. "Why are you being... nice... to me?" he asked.

The look on his face was painfully vulnerable, like no one had treated him with kindness before. She knew that wasn't true, that he only perceived it that way, and somehow the fact made the situation all the more tragic. "Everyone deserves a friend, Loki. Even you." And she walked out the door.

* * *

"Did you really just ask me to let _Loki_ roam around the most vital S.H.I.E.L.D. base in the country, Agent Shade?" Nick Fury's voice was saturated in disdain.

"Yes, I did, Director. You know better than I do that he's lost whatever power he had, he wouldn't even be a real security threat…" Zara was sitting at Dr. Allen's desk, the door to the office firmly closed.

"No, agent, absolutely not. If he got away from you, found a way into any of Banner's labs or into the Stark Weapons vault, it would be disastrous. I can't allow it."

Zara's brain whirred to develop a rebuke. "What if you stationed guards in the corridors. Some of the new recruits, give them a test. If we use the elevator, it's a straight shot down the halls from here to the cafeteria."

She heard him half sigh, half growl into the phone. "Why are you asking me to help him, Zara? You know full well he deserves far less than we've given him already."

"I do know that, sir. I've been trying to develop a psych profile on him, and from what I can tell, he believes that no one has treated him with any sort of humanity in a long, long time. We have him in a unique, essentially powerless, position. I think I can bring him to our side if I play this right."

"You've been inactive for too long, agent."

Zara laughed, "Only too true. Look, it's essentially a zero risk situation, and it's some real world training for the new kids. You know if anything gets out of hand, I'll take care of it."

She was met with the quiet sound of Fury breathing for almost a minute. "Ok, Shade. Not tomorrow, but the next. That'll give me a chance to brief the trainers at the facility. I'm only doing this because it's you, Zara."

"I know, Nick. And I really appreciate it. I won't disappoint you."

"You never have. I hope you know what you're doing. If this goes wrong, it's on you."

"I understand, Director. Oh, and make sure the recruits dress in civilian clothing. It wouldn't do for him to think we don't trust him."

"As you say. Now put Dr. Allen on the phone, please."

Zara pressed the hold button on the phone and left to get the doctor. Bo was standing at the filing cabinet, and she approached him after delivering Fury's message. She didn't know if their relationship was close enough for what she was going to ask of him, but she had to try.

* * *

The rest of the evening had been uneventful. She read on in the _Omnibus of Norse Mythology_, and Loki had progressed to _Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire_. She listened to her Classic Rock play list (heavily featuring Zeppelin IV) for a while before going to sleep.

It started normally; Dr. Allen had given her a large dose of nighttime Advil, which she thought really did help her get to sleep. The weird half dreams of the space between truly sleeping and wakefulness were obviously her subconscious running through the day; Dr. Allen playing a card game with Loki, Director Fury yelling at her for burning a cake in the oven. As she was opening the door of the oven to pull the cake out, she was pulled into the darkness. A void, _the _void, between worlds. She knew it, could feel it pressing against her eyes and ears.

Figures emerged like a gathering mist, slowly becoming corporeal. Loki, on his knees with his hands tied haphazardly, messily behind his back. He wore a muzzle over his mouth. She was torn between feeling sympathy for him and gloating that, for once, he would have be silent. Her attention turned to the figure Loki was facing, and instead of sympathy or humor she felt immediately horror.

The figure, she thought it was male, wasn't particularly tall or broad, but possessed a presence so stifling she could feel it on every inch of her skin. Zara could sense malice radiating from him in waves, and complete confidence; power. It was then she caught the look in Loki's eyes, a look of utter defeat, infinitely worse than it had been on the roof of Stark Tower.

She couldn't move, couldn't even breathe. She couldn't help but watch as the Other mentally and physically tore Loki apart. She was thankful she couldn't hear what he was saying through the metal cage around his blood-red mouth, but her own recent injuries throbbed with empathetic pain as he railed against Loki's face and ribs. _Loki's magic_, she thought. That's why she was seeing this, feeling it so acutely. Why she knew the Other's name. This must have happened to him, and the magic was replaying the event in her mind the way it had happened originally. It meant she finally had some insight into Loki's state of mind; it meant the Other was real.

Just as she thought this, he halted his assault on Loki and looked straight at her, at least she thought he did; his eyes (if he had eyes) were covered by black, rotting fabric. So much energy, so much _hate_ flowed at her she thought she would simply fall apart. The Other straightened, attention directed at her now. She couldn't tear her mind away, even to look to Loki for help, as if he could do anything other than try to survive.

_No, Loki is alive!_ She clung to the thought, willing the magic to wake her up, to call to him in the hospital ward. Just as the Other was approaching her, he and the darkness around him dissolved into the familiar white tiles of the ceiling in the hospital ward of the S.H.I.E.L.D. base.

She was shaking violently from the adrenaline and gasped, "Loki!" He sat up from his bed quickly, obviously already awake. "Loki get over here, right now!" Zara was clutching at her heart as she swung her legs over the side of the bed, blood pounding in her ears.

Loki rounded the end of the bed and moved to stand in front of her when she clutched at his arm and pulled him the rest of the way. She pushed up the sleeve of his tunic roughly, trying to make contact with as much of his skin as possible, grasping his forearm with her good hand. The hand in the cast searched for and found his other hand.

Her breathing was unsteady and frantic. She closed her eyes, willing the magic to calm her down through its contact with Loki. _What was that? How could the Other have known I was there?! _Slowly she regained control of herself and realized she had leaned forward, her forehead resting against Loki's chest. She also realized she was gripping Loki's arm hard enough to bruise it, and she loosened her grip. She stared at the floor, his larger feet at the top of her vision framing hers, trying to collect herself.

She lifted her head and met Loki's eyes, bright green with alarm. She looked as if she had seen something worse than a ghost, as if she had seen…

"What did you see?" he asked, voice grave.

"You… you, and the Other." It was his turn to clutch at her.

"How did you know to call him that?"

"I don't know… I just knew, I felt it… You were, your hands were tied, and-"

"Go no further. I know what you saw, and it is regrettable that you did so" He felt her breathing even. "Are you well enough to release your hold on me yet?"

"Uh, yeah, sorry." She let go and ran a hand over her face as he backed away, leaning against the bed behind him. She took a deep breath before asking, "Who is he? The Other?"

He looked as if he didn't want to tell her, but felt obligated to anyway. "He is the leader of the Chitauri."

Zara let that sink in; she knew there was deep significance in what she saw, but she couldn't think on that right now. It was enough for her to keep from screaming out as his twisted face swam back into her vision. "He looked at me, looked right at me, so angry and…"

"What?"

"At first I thought I was just seeing a memory, residual in your magic," she shivered, thinking of Loki's abuse at the hand of the Other. "But he _looked_ at me, like he was aware of me, but he couldn't have been… I wasn't there when… that… happened."

"No, you were not." Loki was truly afraid for the first time since his failed takeover of Midgard. He would have to lie to her, and hope she believed him, to give himself time to come up with a plan to defend himself from the Other and from his master. "I think the magic combined with the medicine and your weakened state are playing with your mind. It _was_ only a memory, albeit a most nasty one."

"I wonder what else I'll 'remember'," she let out a hollow laugh. Flashes of pubescent Loki, sword fighting with Thor came to mind.

His only reaction was the arching of an eyebrow.

She wrung her hands (as best she could) before she asked her next question. She couldn't afford any more dreams like that, but the alternative, the only way to squelch the magic inside her, was the epitome of embarrassment. _Fuck it_.

"The only way to keep the magic from acting up is to touch you, right?" He responded with a nod. She continued, "I absolutely can not believe I am asking you this, but I don't think I want to see any more of this Other guy… can you… oh my god… can you sleep beside me?"

Loki's eyes went wide in astonishment and she hurried to talk over the awkwardness.

"Not in the same bed or anything! Just roll that bed over here, so I can, I don't know, hold your hand or something. I know it sounds childish and totally ridiculous, but I haven't had quality sleep in two days. Don't you want a good night's sleep, too? I'm sure I was making a ruckus tonight."

"It is the most outrageous suggestion I have ever been given. I _would_ like to sleep uninterrupted by your flailing..."

Under any other circumstances he would have vehemently refused; he valued his solitude and physical person above all else. This was not a normal circumstance though, and he thought he could use their physical closeness to his advantage in his aims to win her allegiance, and ultimately to get himself out of his predicament. The feel of her warm breath through his shirt, heating his skin, had nothing to do with his answer.

"Fine." He turned and rolled the bed next to Zara's. Once he settled in, he extended his hand towards the join between the two.

"Let's just acknowledge how awkward this is and move past it, ok?" she said as she reached out and gently grasped his wrist, hoping it was be less awkward than holding his hand.

"You have no idea."

Before she fell asleep, her mind worked up a hazy thought. When Loki told her the dream was just a memory, his eyes were just a little too… blank. They held the same look when he tried to gain information from her. He had been lying; the Other was coming for them.


	8. So Are You

I apologize for taking so long to update! But there's a reward at the end that I'm sure will make it worth the wait.

Thank you so much for all the reviews, favorites, and follows! I'd appreciate feedback on this chap in particular- does it develop too fast? Hit me up.

Don't own. Happy reading!

* * *

**So Are You**

Zara awoke to the sound of Loki's feet padding down to his end of the ward. Her eyes found the clock; it was just after 9 a.m. This was the first night since she had been taken off the morphine that she got deep, restful sleep. The results were mixed. She didn't feel exhausted, but her body felt worse than ever, like she had exercised intensely the day before and after sleeping, her muscles were sore. She chalked it up to the dream.

Rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she sat up. The _pop_ of her back practically echoed through the room. She heard Loki laugh.

"Sleep well?" he asked.

She turned to face him, face flushing. "Yeah I did, thank you. Was that too weird? Did I do anything awkward?"

"It was a little strange, but no, you stayed still all night."

"Thank goodness," she said under her breath. She made to get out of the bed as the automatic doors to the ward slid open. In walked Bo, holding a brown paper bag with both hands. "Morning, Bo!"

"Good morning, Zara. I brought what you asked. I'll just wait for you in the hall?" He set the bag on the end of her bed, casting a sidelong glance at Loki, whose face registered mild interest at the fact that he called her "Zara" instead of "Agent."

"Awesome, thank you! Yeah, I'll be out in a couple of minutes," she said, walking over to pick up the bag. Loki noted how she grasped the doctor's forearm as she said "thank you." She continued walking towards Loki, bringing the bag with her. "Ok, so. I managed to get Director Fury to clear you to come to the cafeteria for breakfast."

Loki's seemingly forever-arched eyebrow indicated surprise.

"But not until tomorrow morning. I had Bo bring you some human clothes to get used to today; nobody outside the hospital knows you're here, so we can't have you gallivanting around in all your leathery and metallic glory." She didn't mention that the clothes were some of Bo's old things; somehow she had the feeling Loki would balk at the idea of wearing used clothing.

"Ok, so we have pants, commonly called jeans," she said, withdrawing a pair of dark washed denim. "They zip and button in the front; the tags go in the back." She gripped the jeans at the waist, and held her fists to her hips, demonstrating how they should be worn. "The t-shirts you pull over your head, like your tunic. The tags also go in the back," she continued, repeating the demonstrating process with a soft gray shirt. "There's a package of boxers, underwear, in here, too, but I'll let you figure that out. Any questions?"

He had wanted to stop her as soon as she started with her instructions (of course he knew how to dress himself), but decided against it. Watching her gesticulate was too much fun. "No, thank you. I wouldn't want you to keep your dear Bo waiting any longer," he responded sarcastically.

She rolled her eyes and replaced the clothing into the bag. "I'll be back later."

* * *

After a delicious breakfast of pancakes and bacon, Zara and Bo headed back upstairs to the hospital wing. They arrived just a few minutes shy of 10:30, so she hung around by the front desk until a doctor came to take her to the x-ray room. As luck would have it, the diminutive female doctor Loki had taken interest in was scheduled to take her x-ray.

"Agent Shade, if you'll just follow me."

Zara followed her around the corner and through the third door on the right. She noticed the girl was actually very pretty, if she wasn't running from the room. "Just call me Zara, please. 'Agent' is so formal."

She only got prettier when she smiled. "I agree! I'm Lisa Stone. No need for all this 'Doctor' business." Zara wondered if Loki picked on her because she was so attractive; she wouldn't put it past him. "Okay, let's get this vest on. If you'll hop up on the table, we'll get the cast positioned properly…"

Hopping up on the x-ray table was easier said than done, and having to lay on her injured side with the added weight of the lead jacket didn't help matters. She eventually got settled and Lisa moved the cast into place under the machine, then stepped around the wall while the photo was taken.

"Okay, Zara, that's it. If you'll just head back to the infirmary, Dr. Allen will be in soon to let you know if the cast will be coming off today!"

"Great. Thanks, Lisa," she smiled back to her. Zara decided the doctor was friendly enough, but was a little bit too _sweet_. She was very young… easy for Loki to mess with. She was still pondering this as she entered the ward through the automatic doors, the mechanical hiss rousing her from her thoughts.

"Have a nice breakfast?" asked Loki from her right.

She turned to answer him and was greeted with a rare sight indeed. Loki had donned the dark blue jeans and the heather gray shirt, and it was all she could do to stop herself from raking her eyes down his body. "Uh, yes, actually. The bacon wasn't too crispy, which was awesome. Dr. Allen should be coming in soon to take my cast off, hopefully."

Loki glossed over his confusion at the mention of "bacon" and nodded as she sat on her bed. He noted the look of appreciation on her face, satisfied he was closer to his goal of winning her over.

"So, what do you think of human clothes?" She was fumbling for something to talk about to distract her from his deliciously firm chest pressing against the fabric of the shirt.

_She couldn't have set that up more perfectly_. "The… jeans… are more comfortable than Asgardian trousers, but the shirt is a little small, I think," he responded, lifting and flexing his arms. Zara wanted to swoon, then he said, "The underwear are too coarse, so I chose not to wear them. I trust that is acceptable?"

She could have died right then. "Yeah, some people do that…," and she was blessedly saved by Dr. Allen's entrance.

* * *

Removing the cast was easy enough; what wasn't easy was keeping her mind off of the fallen demigod at the end of the room. He was right when he said the shirt was too small, but she hadn't decided to ask Bo to bring some larger shirts or not, he looked so good. The jeans fit his hips just right, and she was surprised to see he had a _nice_ ass.

It was slightly less awkward getting to sleep this time. Around midnight, Loki had put down his book (_Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince)_ and made his way to the bed next to Zara's. He wordlessly dragged the bed toward hers, laid down, and extended his arm. She gripped his wrist and their eyes met silently, and they slipped into oblivion.

Loki couldn't help but feel good about himself. It had been years since anyone looked at him without anything but fear or loathing, and longer still since a woman had looked at him with blatant want. Even though she was mortal, Zara seemed strong and resilient, almost like she had a chip on her shoulder. He could identify with that. He allowed himself to think of her as more than a means to an end and found himself more confused than ever.

* * *

The next morning was a repeat of the previous one, but as Loki arrived at his bed he began undressing, trading his slept-in Asgardian tunic and pants for the new mortal jeans and t-shirt. As soon as he lifted the tunic over his head and the muscles in his back rippled with the motion, Zara lept out of bed and hurried toward the bathroom at the far end of the ward, deciding to brush her teeth. She could handle nudity, but not _his_ nudity and not this early in the morning.

She brushed her teeth and splashed water on her face, trying to shrug off how turned on she was. Her eyes lit on her left arm, only freed from the cast the day before. Its bruising was further along than on her torso, jaundiced yellow mixed with a dark brownish red. She backed away from the mirror and lifted her shirt, turning to look at her side. The raised welts stretching out from her hip were less angry and red but still pink, and it occurred to her that they might never go away completely. The rest of her skin was a little swollen and puffy, but was changing from black and blue to dark purple and green. Well, at least she was still healing. She still moved stiffly, but it her stamina was coming back slowly.

Replacing her shirt, she exited the bathroom, hoping Loki had enough time to finish changing. He had, and Bo had time to show up as well. The sight of the two of them standing awkwardly, taking stock of each other in a most stereotypically masculine way. She smiled, and said a little prayer that this went off without any problems. "Time for breakfast?"

"Yes," the both chimed at the same time. This was going to be fun.

The trip down to the cafeteria was uneventful. She suggested they use the elevator on account of her copious injuries, and neither offered protest. A S.H.I.E.L.D. trainee was placed every thirty feet or so on their route to the cafeteria, some more successful than others at blending in to the background of offices and paper pushers. The elevator ride was the most awkward of her life but in the best way possible; an instrumental Michael Buble song played softly from the speakers overhead. A male trainee on the floor of the cafeteria about halfway from the elevator to the doors was practically staring at them, and Zara did her best to alert him to his mistake without alerting Loki to the same.

They finally made it to the doors of the cafeteria and entered. Bo held the door open for Zara to walk through first and Loki followed after her.

"So, time for a delicious Earth breakfast. Today they have…" she paused as she read the sign quickly, "scrambled eggs, sausage links, and biscuits and gravy."

Loki looked at her skeptically.

"We'll just get some of everything and you can see what you like."

They proceeded to the buffet line, Bo going first. He got his food quickly, and went to find a table. Zara was having difficulty getting Loki to agree to any of the food.

"These 'eggs' look spongy, and if food is yellow on Asgard it's a sign that it's gone bad…"

"It's fine, Loki. I promise I will not ever feed you spoiled food."

"It doesn't need to be spoiled to be disgusting…"

Zara gave him a stern look, which managed to shut him up for about thirty seconds.

"You and this Bo character seem to be getting along very well," he said, as she was reaching for the cartons of orange juice at the end of the line.

"Yes, well, he talks to me even when he doesn't think it'll help him manipulate me or help him find a way out of here," she responded pointedly.

Loki feigned a look of hurt. "I was trying to make friendly conversation. Besides, you seem to have no shame of the fact that you only use me to get a good night's sleep."

She let out a loud sigh and shook her head, heading over to the table Bo was occupying. "That's hardly the same thing. I don't have a choice."

"There is always a choice."

They reached the table, and Zara's temper was already running a little hot. She sat next to Bo and Loki sat on the other side of the table. She grabbed the salt and sprinkled it generously over her eggs. She reached to pick up a pack of jelly and noticed Loki hadn't started eating yet. He regarded his food with a look of vague distaste, like he didn't know which nasty item to try first.

"Try the eggs. Some people like salt and pepper on them, but I just use salt," she said, pushing the shakers towards him. He timidly shook some of both over a small portion of the eggs and tried them.

"This isn't terrible," he responded, after a few seconds of mastication.

"Told you I wouldn't give you anything gross to eat."

The trio continued eating in silence for a few minutes. Loki seemed to be warming to the Earth food, and at the very least Zara was pleased he hadn't caused a scene. She was surprised when he started the conversation, and he directed his attention at Bo.

"So, Dr. Williams, tell me a little about yourself. If we're to become regular attendants at breakfast together, we should have something to talk about."

Bo looked nervously at Zara and she gave a small nod.

"Well, I'm from Maryland. I did my undergraduate work at Vanderbilt and I went to medical school at Johns Hopkins."

Loki could tell by the smug look on his face that he was very proud of his accomplishments; those must have been prestigious schools. "Impressive institutions. What made you enter the field of medicine?"

It was clear Zara was uneasy with Loki's sudden interest in Bo, but not enough to stop it. Bo answered, "Um, well both my parents are doctors. My mom is a surgeon and my dad works in Internal Medicine at our family's practice."

"Ah, so you did it to please your family," Loki summarized, condescension creeping into his voice.

"No, I like helping people, too. It's not just-" Bo was starting to get defensive.

"If that were true, it would have been the first reason you gave, but it wasn't."

"Look, if you knew how hard med school is you'd know you couldn't get through it just for your parents-"

"You know nothing of what I have done to please my family-"

"Guys, stop!" Zara interjected, trying to keep her voice down. "We're just trying to have a nice breakfast. This isn't a competition."

Loki looked at her incredulously. "You're defending _him_?"

"I'm not _defending_ either of you. This isn't the place for macho I-worked-harder-than-you debates. I'm sorry you both have daddy issues, but-"

She was cut off as Loki rose suddenly from the table and headed immediately for the door. "Shit, shit, shit! Stay here," she said to Bo, and cursed her injuries for the thousandth time as she tried to catch up with him before he got through the door to the corridor. If any of the new S.H.I.E.L.D. agents saw Loki without her, their orders were to shoot first and ask questions later. "Loki, stop!"

It only seemed to speed him up. She caught the door as it was swinging closed, his tall, raven-haired form already passed through. "Loki! Loki, wait!" She finally made it through the door, and registered that no less than six of the incognito S.H.I.E.L.D. agents were raising their weapons.

"Hold your fire, agents!"

That finally seemed to get Loki's attention, and he stopped, eyes training on each standard issue weapon, one after the other. After a tense few seconds that felt like it lasted ten minutes to Zara, he looked at her. Anger, betrayal, amusement, and sadness played on his face.

She moved forward to him, calling to the trainees to lower their weapons.

"In the cafeteria, too?" he asked, referring to the hidden agents.

"Yes, but only two. I'm sorry. It was the only way Fury would agree to let you out," she paused, waiting for a response. "You know you would have done the same thing."

He made a noncommittal noise in his throat, and the movement of his Adam's apple distracted her just long enough for him to close the space between them. She backed up, but found herself all too soon pinned against the wall. She couldn't say she was sorry.

His breath was unusually cool across her face as he placed his hands against the wall on either side of her head. He wasn't significantly taller than she was, maybe four inches or so, but she relished the feeling of being small, feminine, and she could see on his face he knew she liked it. "Little minx! You flaunt the human Bo in front of me, when it is clear you attractions lie elsewhere. Why do you deny yourself?"

She laughed at this, cutting through some of the tension between them, and she was glad to see Loki's shoulders relax, even if in confusion. The agent closest to them in the hall had moved out from the door frame he was haunting, clearly alert to the physical danger Loki posed to Zara. She motioned ever so slightly with her hand that he stand down. "Bo and I aren't like that, Loki."

His exquisite brows knitted together. "You are so happy around him… you were stood up for him at breakfast. You touched his arm when he brought these garments to me yesterday."

"Because he's my _friend._ I promise, I'm not Bo's type." His eyes roamed her body, like he couldn't understand how she wouldn't be _anybody's_ type. She elaborated, "Bo is gay, Loki. He is sexually attracted to men."

She watched his eyes as he made the connection, and some of the anger in them dissipated. "Oh," was his only response.

"Yeah. And besides, what's it to you? Why would you care if I was attracted to him?"

"It's nothing to me," he said, backing away from her, letting his hands fall back to his sides. "You can be attracted to whoever you want."

She advanced on him, index finger stabbing at his chest for emphasis. "That's such a crock of shit, Loki! You asked me why I'm denying myself? My answer is that you're the most dangerous being I've ever been in the presence of, physically at least. I can't tell whether you want to take me against the wall or crush my trachea. Why are _you_ denying _your_self? Huh?!"

"You are human," he answered, and felt disappointed instead of disgusted.

"And for right now, so are you." And she looked at him, just _looked_ at him, without judgment or fear, waiting for him to make his move.

He would have been lying if he said this was part of his plan, and a small, logical part of his brain failed to convince him that it was. "Damn," he said, placing a hand on her injured hip. He leaned down to meet her lips, and was greeted with such enthusiasm he couldn't help but smile.

"Don't be so smug," she murmured against his mouth, gripping his arm and hooking her fingers in the neckline of his shirt. His lips were cool against hers, and she lost all sense of place as their mouths worked against each other, neither fighting for dominance, just relieved to finally, _finally_ make contact like this.

She hadn't realized it, but Loki had been walking them back to the wall. Her backside pressed into the chair rail and he applied a little to much pressure to her injured hip. She pulled on the dark hair she twisted in her fist as her muffled moan of pain roused them from their reverie. They broke away, slightly out of breath.

"Go easy on me, Frost Giant."

"Sorry," he apologized, rubbing his thumb back and forth where he had hurt her. The way her cheeks flushed when she called him "Frost Giant" somehow made it easier to hear. "I will if you will."

She smiled. "I promise," and she found his wrist and squeezed gently. "Now, can I finish my breakfast?"

He couldn't help but laugh. "You remind me a bit of Volstagg, one of Thor's lackies. His appetite for food might be surpassed by your own."

She headed back towards the cafeteria door, Loki beside her. "Hey, I'm trying to put my body back together on Advil and sleep. Besides, breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

And she would need to eat a hearty breakfast after what happened in the hall. Fury would hear about it in less than five minutes, she was sure. At least half a dozen S.H.I.E.L.D. agents had seen them _making out_ in the corridor. She needed all the energy she could get to explain her way out of this one.

* * *

What do you think? Let me know! Have a great weekend :)


	9. Liability

Hello everyone! I'm sorry for the wait on this chapter, life's getting busy! **_THANK YOU_** to everyone who has favorited, followed, reviewed, and read since last time!

However, I have a bone to pick **with you, dear reader**: only TWO of you, out of hundreds (that's "hundreds" with an "s"!) reviewed! It's flattering that so many of you are tuning in, but surely you have opinions! I want to hear them, so I'll make it easy for you. Drop me a review on this chap and tell me whether you'd like to see more a) Zara and Stark shenanigans, b) Zara and Loki spunk, or c) Zara and Fury duking it out, for next time.

As always, don't own, and happy reading!

* * *

**Liability**

They made it back to the cafeteria table without further incident, taking up their previous posts. Just as Zara was bringing a forkful of scrambled eggs to her mouth, one of the S.H.I.E.L.D. agents walked up to her, hand extended, holding out a mobile phone. She thought he might be the supervising trainer.

"Director Fury for you, Agent Shade."

She lowered her fork and allowed the air in her longs out in a _whoosh_. "Faster than I thought." Taking the phone, she rose from the table and moved to a quiet corner of the room, keeping her eye on the pair of Loki and Bo all the while. Loki looked at her with vague interested indicated in those ever-mobile eyebrows of his.

"Director?"

"What in the hell, Zara? That's all I've got. What in hell were you thinking?"

"Everything was fine, Director. He hasn't tried to hurt anyone-".

"Those agents were two seconds away from pumping him full of bullets, Agent, don't give me that bull."

"I know, and they did their jobs well! That's a plus right?" She was greeted with silence. "Ok, Fury, Loki got worked up over breakfast, but at least he didn't go on a killing rampage! He's already becoming less volatile-".

"Please. He knows he can't pull another Stuttgart, Zara, he's not an idiot. But he just proved he can get away from you if he needs to, and I don't like that."

She paused. "Where are you going with this, sir?"

"I'm bringing him back to New York. The Avengers are still here, most of them in Stark Tower. I can't risk him escaping again, and you can't handle him by yourself."

She whipped around so Loki couldn't see her reaction. Loki was leaving. It felt like the bottom of her stomach fell out, and she couldn't tell if _she_ was feeling it or if the magic was. She didn't like that. Putting her hand on her hip, she said, "I can, Nick. No more cafeteria excursions, I promise." She hated lying by omission, but she didn't feel like having the I'm-magically-tethered-to-the-maniacal-demigod over the phone. How could she work Fury to keep herself with Loki?

"Don't kid yourself. And you might as well start packing your things, too. We need as many agents up here as possible, field ready or not. Be at the helipad on the roof of the compound in one hour."

That sounded too good to be true, which meant it _definitely_ was, but she would wait to question Fury in person. "Nick, it's not as bad as you think."

"It's usually worse than I think, Zara. Just get both of your asses up here in one piece. Oh, and if I hear another single report that you two did anything more than high-five, expect to be shipped out New Mexico." Since the great Thor debacle of 2011, the S.H.I.E.L.D. outpost had quieted down significantly; it was viewed as the most boring station in North America, and it didn't help that Jane Foster came asking for information about Thor at least once a week.

"I'm sorry, Nick," she responded quietly. She had known Nick Fury nearly all her life, and their relationship was complex, to say the least. He was part eccentric grandfather, part over-protective father, part feared boss, and the balance was hard to establish sometimes.

"I'll see you this afternoon." She held the phone up to her ear for a few seconds after hearing the _click_ of his hanging up, collecting herself. It was true that Loki hadn't actually hurt anyone, but word of their inappropriate contact in the hallway had already made it up to Fury himself. Stark was going to have a field day with the information, she knew. Her moral dilemma seemed to decide itself though; insofar as she could tell, Loki was not worth New Mexico.

She turned and proceeded back to the table to finish her (now cold) eggs. She handed the phone back to the agent and said nothing as she attempted to savor the rest of her food.

It was of course, Loki, who broke the silence. "Have we received a scolding from the _effervescent_ Director Fury?"

"In a way. He's shipping us up to New York City within the hour. Finish your breakfast."

The trio was quiet, thankfully, and only the clatter of flatware on plastic plates sounded over the table. After another few minutes, everyone was done eating. They rose and took their trays to the conveyer belt that led back to the kitchen. Zara delayed just for a moment as she finished her carton of orange juice before throwing it away; somehow she felt that leaving the cafeteria would be the end of the life she knew. _How very existential_.

Bo made the excuse of having some business to attend to on this floor, and she didn't begrudge him the awkward elevator ride back to the hospital wing. She gave him a warm hug, and thanked him for his friendship, sincerely hoping they would be able to keep in touch. The agents in the hallway were much less secretive of their presence on the way to the elevator this time, and Zara could only smile and shake her head. She had been much the same way in her early years.

The elevator doors _dinged_ open, and this time Katy Perry played softly from the speakers. As soon as the doors closed, Loki practically rounded on her. "_So._ We seem to have found some common ground at last, you and I…". He made to cup her cheek, but she gently batted his hand down.

"What happened in the hall was a mistake, Loki. It was entirely unprofessional on my part, and it won't happen again."

For the first time, Zara saw what astonishment looked like on Loki's sharp features. She had to turn away, before the lines of his mouth could distract her. "You're serious?"

"Yes, I am."

He considered her for a moment. "It was Fury."

"Not only him, Loki. My feelings were out of line. This… we… are too great a liability." _And State Farm doesn't sell insurance for this kind of thing_.

He grabbed her wrist, pushing her against the wall of the elevator. This time, instead of lust clouding his eyes, she saw confusion and anger. "Can you pretend not to feel _this_?" He wasn't even consciously aware of it, but he tapped into the magic inside of her, _his_ magic, willing heat to pool just _there_, where he knew it would do the best work.

Her eyes fluttered shut and it was all she could do not to grind her hips forward against him. She swallowed, trying desperately to form words. "I thought you lost your magic."

And as fast as he connected with his magic, the connection broke. He backed away from her as she blinked open her eyes. "Magic is as basic a part of me as my body or my mind; I will never be truly without it, but all my skill and experience have been wiped away. It seems if I focus intensely, I can still perform small acts of magic." _Why am I telling her this?_

They were both saved by the elevator doors sliding open. Loki stepped out between them first, Zara following slowly behind.

* * *

His situation seemed to be getting out of hand rather quickly. Just as Loki was sure he had Zara under his control, she shut that right down. But only for now, he promised himself. There was the added benefit from their excursion in the hall, being moved back to the site where the tesseract was located. He knew his best chance of getting off this planet, of getting his power back eventually, lay with the blue, glowing cube.

That didn't solve his conflicted feelings for the mortal woman, though. It was so fundamentally _nice_ to be wanted, to have a friend. He sensed no deceit in her or her intentions, something that hadn't happened in centuries. His mortal body seemed severely handicapped by physical needs but he'd be lying if he said it didn't feel _good_.

Then there was the problem of the bit of his magic attached to her. He found he did sleep more peacefully while his skin touched Zara's, the pulse of magic a familiar comfort. He didn't know what would happen to it if he ever got his power back, whether it would stay with her or snap back to him. And he was keen on preventing her from having any more visions of the Other, or worse. She already knew too much of his dealings with them, and he was sure she would tell Fury everything she knew as soon as they reached him.

He wondered, too, if he would meet his brother at the tesseract site. With his luck, Thor would be the first person Loki would see there.

* * *

The walk down the hallway back to the infirmary was less awkward than Zara anticipated. The training S.H.I.E.L.D. agents here seemed to shake off _any_ attempts at blending into the background and were standing at attention at regular intervals down the corridor. She entered the ward a few seconds after Loki did, the doors hissing in protest at being forced to open and close so rapidly.

She went to the bathroom and gathered what few toiletries she had and brought them back to her bed, grabbed her duffel bag, and began to shove her possessions in it haphazardly. She turned around to get the Norse mythology book and Tolkien and looked toward Loki. He was holding a couple of neatly folded shirts in one hand, looking questioningly at the brown paper bag Bo had brought his clothes in.

"Bring your stuff here," Zara said. "There's plenty of room in my bag. We can sort it out when we get there."

He gathered his things without protest, thankfully. Upon seeing the mess inside her bag, he asked sarcastically, "You do understand the principles of geometry, I hope?"

"Just put your stuff in there, Loki. There's not point in folding my clothes if I'm just going to wear them later."

"You might argue there is no point in bathing if you're just going to get dirty the next day, either, but you'd be considered a social outcast on Midgard and Asgard alike."

She just gave him an exasperated look and rolled her eyes. He placed his things in the bag as neatly as he could and zipped the bag shut. He lingered there, beside her, for just a little too long. She tried to cover the silence. "Well, we may as well head upstairs. The sooner we get up there the happier Fury will be."

She made to grab her bag and leave, but Loki moved to stand in front of her. She met his eyes, ready for a fight, but he surprised her. "Thank you, for what you've done for me here. You put your career at stake to have me attend breakfast, and I want you to know that I won't forget it."

Completely flabbergasted, she stammered, "Well, you're welcome. I guess." There was something strange about the end of his statement, that he wouldn't forget it. She held out her hand. "Friends?"

Instead of shaking it, which she was certain he knew was custom, he brought her hand to his mouth and pressed his lips to her knuckles. "However you'll have me, Zara."

She rolled her eyes again and shook her head. "Laying it on a little too thick, Loki." She did grab her bag this time. "Let's go."

As they exited the hospital ward for the last time, Dr. Allen rounded the corner by the information desk. "Agent Shade! I just got word you're leaving?"

"Yep, a little earlier than expected, huh?" Zara replied.

"Hardly anything goes as expected here. I'm transferring your records to the temporary S.H.I.E.L.D. base set up in Stark Tower. You'll need to go by once you land and meet with the physician there." The doctor's eyes flicked to Loki just for an instant. "Good luck, Zara."

"Thanks, doc." She shook the older woman's hand, and smiled warmly.

Back in the elevator (old school Beethoven this time, only it sounded like a dubstep remix), Loki offered to carry the duffel bag, but Zara refused.

"I wonder what they'll do with you once we get to New York.", she pondered.

"Probably lock me up again. That always seems to go so well."

She snorted. "They really don't have much of a choice, though."

"No, I suppose not. What will you be doing?"

"I'm not exactly sure. I'm not in any shape to help with damage control… it's possible they only want me up there because I've been shacked up with you for so long…" She immediately regretted her choice of words.

He only gave her a quizzical look as the elevator doors opened onto the top floor of the S.H.I.E.L.D. base. They were greeted by two armed agents, not trainees this time, who flanked them up a flight of stairs and out onto the roof. Zara's injuries slowed the trip on the stairs, and when she refused Loki's help with the bag again, he simply took it from her, mumbling what sounded suspiciously like "stubborn."

* * *

The helicopter flight to New York City was pretty standard, although Zara would never get used to the sudden movements the copters could make (she much preferred planes). Loki seemed fascinated with the technology, almost like a kid in a candy store. Zara tried to kill some time by listening to her iPod, and shared her earbuds with Loki when his attention turned to the device in her hands. He really liked instrumental pieces and Blues, she found, but was ambivalent towards the Classical and Rock genres. He hated the Pop songs she played for him, dry heaving when Carly Rae Jepson's "Call Me Maybe" came up in a playlist.

The ruined skyline of the city was striking in the mid-afternoon light and Zara was shaken as she remembered the few conscious moments on the rooftop. She set her iPod down next to her leg on the seat, one hand staying on it, the other coming up to her face to cover her eyes. She breathed in slowly through her nose and felt a cool touch on the back of her hand that hovered over the iPod. Calm flooded through her, layered with just a thread of, what was it, _apology?_ By the time she took her hand from her eyes, Loki was sitting stoically in the seat beside her, hands folded in his lap, staring straight ahead.

The copter landed on the roof of Stark Tower, and the first thing Zara noted was the absence of the tesseract and the machine that opened the space portal. The next thing she noticed was the partial group of Avengers waiting for her and Loki to disembark from the aircraft: Stark, Natasha, Rogers, and Thor. What a sight. She heard Loki groan as she ducked below the rotating blades and made her way, as best she could, toward the group.

Tony greeted her first. "Zara Shade! Long time, no see. Now, I know you'll hate me for asking, but why do you keep rejecting my invitations to the S.H.I.E.L.D. get-togethers? You know they're a great time…"

"Some of us actually have to work for a living, Tony. And good to see you, too." She shrugged off his arm and moved to hug Natasha as she heard Stark greet Loki.

"What's up, Reindeer Games?"

Loki just looked coolly at him.

"Alright, I guess I'd keep silent if I got Hulk-smashed, too. Nothing like losing a battle against a subordinate race to crush your spirits."

Zara could see Loki bristling. She stepped between them and just barely touched Loki on the wrist. "Tony, we all know not even that could keep you silent."

Natasha's surprisingly bright laughter cut through the tension, adding another to a long list of favors Zara owed her. The Captain moved forward to take the luggage from Loki as Thor addressed him.

"Brother, it is past time you and I had a word."

Zara looked to Loki, not knowing if he would even consider speaking to his brother on terms like this. He nodded to her, though, and followed Thor through the service door that was propped open.

"C'mon, Zara. Let's get you settled in," the Black Widow turned, followed by Cap and Zara, Tony taking up the rear.

She prayed neither Nat or Rogers heard Stark whisper in her ear, "JARVIS picked up some interesting information from the D.C. S.H.I.E.L.D. compound. I think you'll be pleased to know we've set you and Bunny Ears up in adjoining rooms. You're welcome."

* * *

EEEeee! Let me know what you thought of this chapter, and if you'd like to see more** a) Stark, b) Loki, or c) Fury** in the next installment!


End file.
